Re: Kotegaeshi: hand or wrist?
I believe the way we do it in Korindo would be considered as grabbing the hand, though the small fingers are at the base of the palm and not in it (nor on the wrist).
We still get a connection to the center, no prob.
We do not make a big throw normally , rather throw Uke to be close by, and direct the throw directly down-wards. Most larger throws I have seen give more of an opportunity for reversal (depending on the quality of the Kuzushi, if good enough it should not matter at all).