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Old 04-21-2011, 09:57 AM   #42
akiy's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2000
Posts: 5,997
Re: Is Aikiweb an open Aikido Forum ? Or is it a

Attilio Anthony John Wagstaffe wrote: View Post
Hey Jun, much as your post is to get people to lighten up, it's not me who is getting upset here, I just ask why?
My asking for people to refrain from making things personal is not directed towards whether people are being "upset" nor "honest." Rather, it is about whether people are discussing the topic or the people behind the topic. When posts are filled with "you are" and "you think," I'd reckon that those posts are targeting the person rather than the topic at hand. Doing so, in my mind and experience, often creates unnecessary friction through assumptions, attacks upon the person, and aggression sometimes -- all of which get in the way of civil discussion.

Once again, I am fine with controversial topics and people who have differing opinions. What I am talking about is not that, but rather to make sure that the direction of these discussions remain on-topic rather than becoming personal.

I know what your stance is on this so I understand that you may not comment, that is fair enough, it's your site and power to you, but if we can't say things without people going all "snotty" and getting over sensitive, where do we go? If you ban me for life? No big deal, but think how dull it will become because people are too timid to say what they really think..... I just happen to be one of 'em...
I think you are responding to my posts asking for respectful dialogue with a discussion of what to talk about. Those are two entirely different topics, in my mind. To clarify, again, I am not talking about what people here discuss but how they discuss it. I am all for people saying "what they really think," as long as it's done in a respectful manner -- and that includes (if I may borrow more of your words) those who are being "honest" and being "oversensitive" both.

Hope that helps,

-- Jun

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