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Old 04-14-2011, 03:17 AM   #13
Carsten Möllering
 
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Dojo: Hildesheimer Aikido Verein
Location: Hildesheim
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 815
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Re: One more time. Ho do you tell your sensei they need help

Hi

I know your problem very well. I experienced similar situations more than just once, looking back all those years. I had to go through this with my own teacher. And I saw it happen in other dojo I know well.

The most important insight I got:
Quote:
... you want her to regain that lost skill, she once had. You want her to shine, ...
This will not happen. In most cases when I saw sensei loose their abbilities, this had reasons which where deeplly anchored in their live. And it always was a very long time process until I or we only recognized what happened. Those teachers would have neede to change their lives (money, familie, priorities, things like that).

Quote:
ocusing on teaching and neglecting their personal training,
This mostly is the reason when teachers loose it. Is there a possibilitie make her practice for herself? Can you help this??? Will she do it???
We wanted to help one of our former sempai. So one of us led the practice once a month instead of him. But he didn't use this possibility to practice himself. He just stayed away from training when he was "free".

Quote:
How to you tell your sensei (with respect) their waza isn't as good as it once was a few years ago.
How? There is only one way to tell someone something: You have to talk to her. It's just that. No easy way, no shortcut, not helpfull phrases.
"sensei, in my eyes, your technique is not good anymore as it used to be."
I had such a conversation with my teacher. And I was very baffled: He affirmed every word of my critique. He had seen it, long before I did. (He quit aikido about half a year later. And he was very happy with that!)

Quote:
if you don't get it together I finding a new dojo
This you needn't say to her. She will know. And she will not change her life because of the choises you make for yours. (Or at least she shouldn't.) Just think it over: Where do you want to practice? Where is your heart? Maybe you can learn a lot from the assistant teachers. And in senseis training just move and throw and roll and enjoy yourself and aikido?

Sorry for your situation! I know how this hurts and how difficult this is.
But:
Your experience is not uncommon. Thing like this happen. It's not a matter of course that teachers grow all the time.
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