Again, I am very appreciative to read the thoughts of everyone.
Again, I appreciate what others have to say. But, at the end of the day, this is a Martial Art...Due care should be taken and training should be serious and enlightening....And when someone steps out of line, there needs to be an immediate correction. Hopefully by the sensei, as some have stated here.
I understand you feel your perspective is above reproach, and the onus falls on the other individual. Thus, you views and behavior is without fault; void of admonishment, or critique. It is the individual and their personal predisposition, and background creating experiences that formula individual expectations of behavior for the relationship and resulting individual behavior of both parties. Thereby dominating our perceptions of who is and isn't at fault. Resulting in the impedance to productive conflict resolution; applying to both parties involved.
Without objective circumspect of our own behavior and how it effects others and our environment, we can't objectively evaluate our own and that of others. Training can't be done alone to truly be benefitical. We must have mutual respect and tolerance of others, placing aside our judgements and expectations of others' and their behavior during training in the dojo.
We also must understand it is a Martial Art that lends itself to male stereotypes. As well as, both male and female low level controlled aggressive behavior. The cynosure of personal conflict comes from the same precipice found in most domestic relationships, the common power struggle. Amplified, not mentioned, gender expectations and prejudices.
When we understand that we are a whole human "beings" and how we effect other's and the environment we exist in, we can better navigate personal relationships towards a platform of an harmonious mutual training and understanding of ourselves and others.
Yes, both are at fault. I would like to point as well to the reponses given in the thread in the Anonymous forum titled, "is there another solution" where posters direct thoughtfully why both individuals are equally at fault and why. Very enlightening indeed.