Until a person has experienced this then of course they can't see it.
Here you seem to be suggesting that none of these folks who have criticized your training have experienced ki-based training. Is that the case?
As for the martial intent, well I can only tell you this: Once O'Sensei said true budo is love and then formed Aikido I believe at that point the whole purpose of this martial discipline changed. No longer was it to defeat the enemy or to dominate or to win etc. It was now to harmonise and thus the spiritual side of the techniques and motions needed to be fully understood and experienced which takes far more discipline than mere physical.
Are you saying your practice is unconcerned with remaining standing after someone attacks you? Or that it is a secondary or tertiary concern compared to generating an enjoyable, healthy feeling?
My meager sense of O Sensei's intent for Aikido was that, yes, on the whole it should feel good, but that "harmonization" has more to do with operating in accordance/concordance with natural laws/forces/strengths. Love is the ki we try to imbue our movements with so we cause as little harm as possible. In other words, sometimes we may need to let the attacker hit us for the greater good to come about, but sometimes we may also need to break something to serve that same noble goal. Knowing the difference and being able to account for both is damned hard, but that's why the need for such constant and sincere/intense training.