I see, I was naive in coming here thinking I wasn't going to be the butt of jokes and a target for accusations and insults.
Welcome to the internet!
Also, for what little it may be worth, I'd just like to suggest there may have been communication problems on all sides here. The more you explained, the more I found exception with (e.g. lazy matt and bagogab are me).
That said, seriously, have fun! Rugby looks like a lot of fun, and if you're playing full-contact, you'll probably be able to still work on how to negotiate a particular variety of incoming physical force anyway. I'm not sure exactly why you were interested in Aikido, but that's usually one of the more popular reasons.
The essence of my advice is simply to not shut yourself off from possibilities: assume nothing...and may i suggest you not transfer your resentment onto other situations/dojos.
Best of luck!
IMO, that's not really that unusual. Often people who feel strongly about something can have a strong reaction against it if they become disillusioned. That kind of all-or-nothing feeling seems to happen to a lot of people in all kinds of situations.
One of the reasons I felt compelled to respond was because of this. The language reminds me of a best friend of mine who tends to respond with that all-or-nothing quality...Hopefully that association didn't skew my perception too much.