Re: I think I'm feeling burnout or worse. I am seriously considering walking away.
I have seen instructors & students act very cultish with quotes from them burned into my memory from years ago ("Don't tell anybody I'm curling my hair before my ranking, they will think I'm superficial" "I can't go to the party unless my sensei gives me permission"). There IS another way to train, without trashing your body or surrendering your own inner core. Go find it now.