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Old 01-17-2010, 04:09 AM   #21
dalen7
 
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Re: I am the universe

Intro:
There are 3 separate experiences I would like to relay concerning the mind and its mysterious connection to what may/may not exist beyond the everyday ordinary.

Death, Near Death, & O.B.E.
[First observation, the other first hand experience]

First: A little background for perspective
It must be noted, as it is quite relevant, my cultural/spiritual upbringing. [Evangelical Christian - though this label does not necessarily work for me as of recently, I could say I took the relevant teachings deeper.]

Having said that, one thing which had interested me is the fact that with N.D.E.s everyone saw something different when they were on their death bed. [i.e., Christians, Jesus, Buddhist Buddha, etc.]

Now an argument can be made that many people have reported seeing hell, but in light of the above statement with people seeing what was relevant to their milieu it must be stated that even an 'atheist' is affected largely by their cultural collective milieu, so that even if you didnt believe in heaven or hell, America - as it had been for quite some time - was largely influenced and self-labled as being a Christian nation.

So this factors into ones experience, regardless of the small circle of influence that may have spoken otherwise, unless of course they were connected through an umbilical chord, as it were, to another strong connection. [i.e., transplant from another nation with a strong religious upbringing such as Buddhism, Hinduism, or even Judaism.]

1 day is like a thousand years, etc.
DMT/Tryptamines, etc.

With the experiences I am about to relate, it has opened up a whole new door for me in regards to the question of "what is reality", etc.

In fact, I have read more material than you can imagine, [from people with first hand experience], as well as from all the leading Medical Journals. [J.A.M.A., Journals of Science/Nature, the LANCET, etc. If you havent peaked into the journals you would be surprised at what you would find regarding certain, publicly percieved, 'taboo' subjects.

Anyway the experiences I have read about and encountered personally through accidents, meditation, etc. were quite similar as to those of the psychonaughts, as you may call them, of RamDass, Terrance Mckenna, etc.]

It made me question if the brain upon death isnt giving you one last trip... the first being an good explosion of naturally occurring dmt at birth [of which we know you need a MAO inhibitor to make it active, but the fact of DMTs existence and its current nature of relatively being new to us and not understood, its worth making a comparison none the less in order to gain perspective of what may be going on.]

Death:
First, which is actually I believe the latest experience, though the O.B.E. was mighty close in time, was that of when my father-in-law passed away.

We had moved back in 2005 to Hungary, and lived with my father-in-law [and mother-in-law] for the last 3 months, approx. of his life.

In fact, I was in the room next to his, awake, as he was in the room parallel with the medics, his wife, daughter, & son... and then he passed away. [he had been very ill for some years and it progressively had gotten worse.]

Of great interest was, at the time as mentioned, I was in the room next door in the house, and I felt a big gust of cold wind, as it were, blow upon the upper half of my body - primarily my face.
[gust of wind does not adequately describe what I felt, but will have to do for now... it was brief, none-intrusive, but very much present.]

At that moment I thought... "he's dead"

Right after that, my wife came in the room and told me he had passed away.

Now people die everyday, and Im not aware of reports of gusting, etc. [no windows open, etc. and again this is not the most adequate description], however there are many factors that we do not have, as each experience is quite different as well as the persona who has the experience.

I saw him immediately after this and then later when they took him out. There was something of keen interest to me and it was at one point it was clear that the person who was there, was no longer there...

... when is 'dead' continued from above story
When the heart stops your dead... no? Or is it when the brain dies?
My theory is that when he had been announced dead and the breeze had happened his heart had died... [in this period is when we have that last DMT trip where a day is like a thousand years, etc. - also, consider the stories we have of the spirits either going to the light... wondering around as they are confused, how does this all play into the 'last trip', and I dare not go into trying to analyze this here]

Also, later as I saw him, I speculate that it is safe to say he was brain dead, and thus the 100% feeling of noone being there, as was not the case before. [Again, this is my own personal perspective, etc. based on what I saw against my other experiences as well.]

O.B.E.
Not long after this happened, we had stayed with my mother-in-law, same house, and to be quite frank this year has been termed the year of hell for both me and my wife.

We encountered some serious struggles which were brought on by unforeseen events. [income gone, house gone we were supposed to have had, etc.] It was a very stressful time which I believe helped both of us in our spiritual/emotional growth - though no one would wish such a hard time for anyone, typically it is through the fires that we are refined. [and of which I dropped all the extraneous labels and beliefs which no longer truly helped, though later would see from what I believed that which could be taken deeper.]

Either way, I was stressed, so I went into the room on one night and turned on Eckhart Tolle and laid down and just opened my mind and meditated.

Whether this is real or not, and many may obviously be skeptical of it being anything but something made up inside my mind... of which I may ask, "is there anything but what is made up within our minds?"

Either way I looked up at the desk as I was meditating and then I got up and started walking to the door... it was now late and I was afraid to go through the door. [mainly mother-in-law to be honest, I did not wish to hear her at the time], so I went to turn around to go back to rest... yet I was there resting and then I got up.

Confusing? [Well, I wish at the time, I had known that I was not really up and walking, and that perhaps this was some grand waking dream, as I would have tried to wake my wife to verify and ask her to see if she saw me and the me on the floor as well.]

Is this an O.B.E.? Is it a lucid dream and I just did not know I fell asleep and everything connected so nicely, except for a slight glitch of being here than there?

Again, when you look into people and medical studies who have tested the likes of DMT, etc. on people - these stories sound similar - with the exception that I was not doing anything.

N.D.E.
At around the age of 18/19 i believe it was, I was riding my bicycle home from church and a trans-am pulled in and hit me.

Of course I saw it coming, and yet I did not have time to do anything. [You know the stories of how things slow down... this is one of them... it was fast enough I could not do anything, but the amount of thoughts I had while this was taking place was amazing... and I still remember]

I thought, "this thing will hit me! Im going to go under the car and thats not good, try to roll on top of it" - and thus it hit and my body i pushed up instead of it going down.

now what happened physically after that I can tell you, though I dont remember anything. I know that I rolled on the car and my head cracked his windshield. [no bike helmet], and then I was on the ground.

space... nowhere land contin. of above story
Now while my physical body was lieing on the ground and covered in blood solely from the approx.two inch gash in the side of my head [yes head wounds are said to bleed a lot], here is what was happening in my 'new world'

Suddenly I was in the middle of blackness.
But know this, I was 100% 'awake' and aware.
Ironically I had no conception of my life whatsoever.
Parents? Who are they? Earth? What is that? [It may have been a faint thought.]

No, ironically I was in blackness looking at a different type of blackness kind of to my upper left I suppose and expecting something to come from that direction.

It felt like a room, honestly, and there was yet a deeper blackness up high to the right where I felt was a "judges table" and I was awaiting for God to swoop in from the left and deal me my judgement.

I had time to ponder this, though I did not think of any specific events of my life... none at all. I was pondering if God would send me to heaven or hell.

At that point I figured, I had not been perfect, [despite my obsessive compulsive nature brought on by my strict upbringing], yet here I was relaxed and felt that I would just go up and hug God as all was good and there was really no problem.

As I imagined this scenario of me going up and hugging an invisible God [hugging space], something interesting happened... I awoke to this reality again.

I was on the ground looking, people were around me but this reality was still not cemented yet. [like waking from a dream, where I have had it where I hear nothing, then the audio clicks in... interesting as well... ], anyway I remembered wishing that I were in Florida and not in Georgia. [Dont ask me why, its just my preference at the time for various reasons... and that was the only thought I had.]

And it turned out I was in Florida, [not saying this is a miracle], and the scene became alive and the medic was there telling me not to shut my eyes and not to sleep. [I had an IV in my arm, which I suppose is quite typical for anyone an ambulance goes out for], and then at one point I was fully aware of the waking reality around me. [Had my head MRI and docs said it was normal, all was well - they said that the head wound was just messy cause head wounds bleed alot, but I was fine.] And that is that.

Conclusion:
These stories may not be a 'wow' factor for anyone... and that is quite fine. But what is important is the imprint that it left on me as well as the assistance in self-discovery that these experiences acted as a catalyst for.

Many times we keep tight to that which conventional wisdom, of our milieu, teaches us, and we loose site of all the true meaning of the allegories and to what they point to.

"Row, row, row your boat - gently down the stream, merrily, merrily, merrily - life is but a mmmm"

I had a 3rd grade music teacher from an asian country who made us say, "mmm..." and was quite upset with the term 'dream', as life "is not a dream" [in effect it is a pagan teaching was her point, and quite satanic]. - I was in a Christian academy/school at the time, and people who switch from one religion to another tend to be all the more a zealot than one who grew up in a given religion. [hence Jesus term, "twice the son of hell", and the philosophy behind this makes perfect sense once you get it.]

The point is, people, with no where else to turn... their story is already been destroyed once, and with no other polar opposite to turn to - they will cling all the more to this polar opposite, instead of "floating above the abyss" and seeing it was all part of the same 'story'

Either way, I would say, perhaps there is something to the song, maybe indeed it is true the conclusion to that song we were not allowed to finish singing, which simply is, "row your boat... life is but a dream!"

Peace

dAlen

p.s.
Hopefully this is somewhat coherent, as it is long.
My tendency is to type and post - correct as I go along. [I do the same with my blogs]
Anyway, maybe there was some points that are worth reflecting - as I believe I have nothing new to add, as each person has to discover on their own what is necessary for their journey. [though they do not necessarily have to experience everything, it is obvious that the only truth for any given individual is the truth they make for themselves.]

Last edited by dalen7 : 01-17-2010 at 04:13 AM. Reason: add "p.s."

dAlen [day•lynn]
dum spiro spero - {While I have breathe - I have hope}

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