A number of people posting to this thread have suggested I get more experience and training, rather than sharing the fruits of their experience or training.
My personal experience is that to learn physical movements, particularly ones that are challenging and have safety implications, you need to learn them in person, and to learn them accurately and safely, you need to practice many times and have experienced people to show you things and different people to try them with many times in different ways. For my part, and I think for many people here, if I tell you to get more training from someone in person, it's not to be rude, it's because that's the best, most helpful advice I have
Also, at least from my own experience, the challenge in doing wrist locks safely and effectively is not primarily a matter of _knowing_ they are difficult or _knowing_ they can hurt someone (you will figure that out pretty quickly when it's your turn to be uke) -- e.g. it can actually be quite difficult to judge how much pressure you're putting on a person, even in a cooperative friendly environment, since every person's body is so different. It's a _skill_, and it takes practice and concentration and communication and even then accidents can happen. It's also far easier to put on a meaningless ineffective lock than one that actually works.
And I'm also not convinced wrist locks are the most useful thing for your goal.