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Old 01-10-2009, 09:39 AM   #39
Tony Wagstaffe
Location: Winchester
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 1,211
United Kingdom
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Re: Aikido A Place to Find True Love?

Its how I met my wife!!
At first she was a student just as any other and we happened to meet accidentally in a local watering hole about 2 months later where in fact I knew her brother!! .....Small world eh!
Or did she find out where I watered occasionally......I wonder ?......

All the other students had no idea that we were an item until a year later......

We kept it off the mat and out of the dojo and I did not show her any favoritism......At first she thought she joined the army!!...... She said she found it tough at first (Her Father was a Regimental Sergeant Major!!)
Admittedly she did progress very quickly..... well she was bound to with all the private instruction and her rare ability in being able to pick it up almost straight away..... She got from novice to Shodan in 2 years!! Ni Dan within 8 years British Aikido Association..... she didn't bother much for gradings, much as myself.....
We as a club weren't all that interested in "rank" and the numbers game...... More in the practice!! .........In fact it used to embarrass many of the so called higher dan grades...... My wife won quite a number of enbu demonstration competitions at national events and was well respected by those of "higher level"

I've always felt that any "romance" should be left outside the dojo and the dojo be a place of the "way" as it should be.......

There was the odd romance that sometimes blossomed in the dojo, but they knew full well to keep it "outside" of practice and the dojo.... those that didn't were quietly taken aside and warned that this is not the time and place for such matters and as such did not transgress any further after that.
We were quite strict on that scenario.....
Ie/......Less chat more "do"
We always had the rule to change ones training partner often within a practice session, so "things" were kept at bay..... and you learned tolerance of your fellow human.......
Bullies and know it all's were always quietly admonished or taken outside the dojo for a "chat" or shown the door rapidly according to transgression..... Sometimes just a look said it all and things returned to normal.....

But things change, "political correctness" and litigation now seems to be in sway almost to the point in strangling free speech and common sense.......

Tony
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