Thread: How to Say No
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Old 01-01-2009, 10:24 PM   #45
Buck
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 950
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Re: How to Say No

My advise:

1. Confront and ask to stop. If that doesn't do it. See 2.

2. Notify the Sensei. If that doesn't work or it is the Sensei see 3.

3. Find another dojo.

How to confront someone making you feel uncomfortable, if you don't know how. That requires advice from others. I recommend professionals, family, etc.

What if your too shy etc. to confront the person or the Sensei. Have someone in the dojo or outside the dojo to do it for you if they are willing. If they are not, then the best thing to do is leave the dojo. Don't stay in an uncomfortable situation.

And by all means, don't get physical unless faced with harm, self-defense is important. Keep in mind, tht you have to be sure you have the right opportunity to strike. Because more than likely, which is being overlooked by some posters giving advice to get physical, the attacker being Aikidoka is better trained and experienced than you are, especially if they come from a "hard" Aikido philosophy.

My advice is then don't let it get that far, if the first "no" doesn't work and things don't get resolved after that then things are only going to get worse.

Aikido has a real problem it ain't facing, because of the many number of these types of posts of sexual harassment is an epidemic in Aikido dojos and among male Aikido Senseis. I would seriously consider dropping Aikido all together. The sexual harassers number high with the male Senseis and also with male senior students of Aikido, according to the number of posts discussing this situation. Now hearing this news it may be in your best interest to never take Aikido as there is the chance, if you drop your current dojo for another, of running into this same situation again in the next dojo

Last edited by Buck : 01-01-2009 at 10:32 PM.
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