I knew something was really troubling me about this whole thing
The Dojo itself has been bothering a bit also... The whole school seems a bit off. Or as Lan says impersonal. While we're all looking for different things in our training enviroment trust should be one of those things. I get the feeling that Anon.. Can't or doesn't trust her own instructors\sempai with a problem she's having on the mat. If you can't trust your senor students to stop something as small as this then how can trust them not to harm you? Especially when you're training with higher level students who will be throwing\attacking harder and faster?
This of course is just my take on the subject.... Again I'd suggest asking his wife. That should put a brunt stop to it