If I change the trajectory of my punch, or second guess where my hand is going during an ukemi because of fear of what might get touched, my mind is focused on my partners gender, and not on my attack/my technique. It's the same if I go easy with a partner for any other reason than that the person needs more experience. If I go easier because of gender, then it is a failing on my part in not keeping the correct mindset.
This is a little bit off-topic but my first instructor found himself teaching defense against the bayonet whilst in the military. One of his students decided to protect him by striking off the line. Student winds up with a knife in his arm (lost partial use of it) and my instructor wore dentures.