Some of my favorites...
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." -- Albert Einstein
"Seeing a murder on television... can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any antagonisms, the commercials will give you some." -- Alfred Hitchcock
and one last one to spare you all, cause I have tons!
"Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power." -- Abraham Lincoln