Good to hear you're back on track!
If I understand right, you moved to Hungary? so where are you from originally and why did you choose Hungary ?
It's good to hear that even with all the doubts and thoughts, you finally chose to go back and do it. Not a lot of people does that, and it shows that you have character!
always ask questions and do not try to stuck on little things, they will flow in eventually.
Thanks for the comments...
I moved to Hungary 3 years ago come this June 14th...although I have not yet taken up the task to learn the language - beyond that which I already mentioned, the common phrases that have to do with basic survival. (In truth I understand a bit...just cant get the words out yet...)
Why I moved...freedom in short.
I had an opportunity to spend time with my wife and 4 kids without having to work anymore. Sounds ideal when you say it that way...'Im retired in my early 30s', but again most people who may envy this would drop the envy when they realize it comes down to what is important to that individual...a give and a take.
I took freedom and got Hungary.
Not that Hungary is a bad thing, but when you give up that which you are accustomed to, living in Atlanta, a city of 4+ million people...to live in a village of 25k people...where no one knows english (not really, and if they do, you wont know as they are to shy to speak), and the social, cultural milieu is as backwards as you can imagine it to be from my way of life. (backwards not in a bad way...just different.) I would compare the mentality to any small city though, throughout the world...anyway, not sure how well Im getting across what Im trying to say which is the grass always looks greener on the other side...you have to learn to be happy where you are. And while Im happy to be with my family, Im learning to be content to be happy where I am with them here in Hungary.
You hit the nail on the head...not to get stuck on little things...I think I made a living out of doing that, and that now is my 'spiritual practice to let things flow'.
It truly is amazing, because Aikido from the very beginning has been a great tool to challenge my ego and help me observe things on a spiritual level. But its interesting as I notice that the tool is only as good as what the person makes it out to be. It appears, from my observation, that Aikido is as much a spiritual tool to them as a t.v. is without electricity. Point is, I suppose, is things are whatever we make them out to be.