It usually goes like this for me.
We finally get around to doing some matwork in judo, after the match someone will ask "Why are you so good at matwork, when do you practice?" I respond, "Oh I do that 3-4 days a week". Then they ask where. I mention a bjj club. They say "But why, it's just all ripped off judo anyways.". Then I point out I'm better on the mat then they are, and argument begins.
There's a 'parable' about falling into holes that your post reminds me of
Don't ask, don't tell isn't just for the US army