Perhahs a few words coming from experience would be helpful:
Some of the answers that you will find are limited to the lengths that one, as an individual, is wiling to go when executing a technique or wrestling with another human being. It should always be considered that causing death is an option, if not for you, than for them. And the games that people play to replicate this can fall short of the reality of a moment where a life is about to be gained or lost. No one is there to say "yamae" and no tap out will do.
I couldn't agree more.
I think practices where people are actually trying to work against you are so much closer to how it would be if someone was trying to take your life. Uke/Nage training is all fine and good. But it never gives you that feeling that you will get when someone is actually working against you, trying to harm you, and doing everything in their power to keep you from achieving your objective (peace).
Nice post Jennifer!