Try "catching" the hand of someone punching or stabbing with a rubber knife and not cooperating when you try a technique and you'll find the answer imho.
Experience speaks volumes where words can only do so much.
Perhahs a few words coming from experience would be helpful:
Some of the answers that you will find are limited to the lengths that one, as an individual, is wiling to go when executing a technique or wrestling with another human being. It should always be considered that causing death is an option, if not for you, than for them. And the games that people play to replicate this can fall short of the reality of a moment where a life is about to be gained or lost. No one is there to say "yamae" and no tap out will do.