Thanks for all the replies 'till now it has been quite great and very helpful. Especially mle's - thanks for trying to bring me back to the ground and not to encourage me
At first to Aries:
Just for the record - Unfortunately I'm not very skilled in this part 'cause my teacher doesn't put a big emphasis on that.
Then to JK:
Just thanks for the most practical advice.
And last but not least to mle:
<Erm.. first of all, what are you doing "sparring"? >
I personally think that anyone who wanted to should do sparring... - afterall it is a little closer to the reality than prearranged methods and mybe even standard randori. And of course we had all the protective gear and his si-hing to instruct.
<Play, have fun, learn. >
I think Aikido suits me... (as I said I wouldn't do it if I wouldn't think that way)and that's what I did the sparring for - to have fun and to learn something out of it. And I did I think. Somewhere inside I was probably wanting also proof to my fighting-ego and nonexistant combat skills:P As I and my friend have always been sort of competitive to eachother then maybe I was just looking for to put him in his place which is exactly a very wrong use of Aikido which is exactly WHY I lost and why I felt quite devastated about that.
I'll do it again... definitely... but I wil try to keep up a different mindset for that time and then maybe I'll learn a different lesson.
I try to be ME
Never losing means never fighting!