Perhaps this is a logical distinction, but I feel that the intention of uke and nage need to be taken into account when discussing things like this. Of course well done kuzushi doesn't take much, that's how kuzushi works, but the question in my mind is whose version of the desired outcome is actualized? If uke's goal is to grab or stike nage, they have no intention to be thrown or thwarted. Nage's goal is to avoid injury and throw or otherwise disable uke's goal of harm. I don't care one bit how 'easy' or subtle nage's movements are to off balance uke. Even if they're using uke's own reflex arcs against them, their (nage's) intention is causing uke's loss of balance and nage has to face the fact that they went into the encounter with ego and intention and that there's nothing wrong with that. Yes the strategies can include moving as a unified whole (moving with uke as you say), and some of the really subtle stuff may occur almost exclusively within nage's body, but the intention of the encounter is that of nage imposing their will over uke. I simply refuse to believe otherwise, it makes no logical sense to me, and I have never felt it from anyone (including a lot of people claiming that was what they were doing). So if you're adding that little bit of help, why not admit the reality of the encounter and accept your role in the encounter? (Please read that last sentence as a rhetorical question, and not a direct attack on you personally.)
I agree that intentions are very important and add a lot to the definition of what unfolds and how it does so. But to say that my goal is to impose my will on uke is not what I feel to be my intention. This is why I do Aikido, and in particular, the kind of Aikido I do. For one thing, there is a difference between imposing my will on someone and simply not allowing them to impose their will on me. And that's only the tip of the iceberg, but an important tip.
If it were as you say, I would choose any number of other approaches, like BJJ but certainly including other styles of Aikido - they would all be acceptable to me. But for where I personally am at, I'm after something else. That something else has to do with the actual experience I have, the experience uke is left with, the physical, emotional, moral, ethical, and spiritual outcome, and the way that can be actualized in one's approach to the physical manifestation of Aikido.
A lot of people might say that those are just words, or any number of other reactions I have gotten and I'm sure will get in the future. But this is totally real to me, and it works in real life and in real time for me as well.
For me, it really is - to each their own. I am not trying to convince you that my way is right for you, my path and way of training are definitely not for everyone. But it frankly seems like you are saying that my way is not really real, and not really achievable.
That's not my life experience.