Re: Getting very discouraged, need your help.
I may be setting myself up for some serious ridicule here but I have to say to you "Congratulations".
I find that whenever I feel that way, it makes me question myself, and my art, and my reasons for practicing Aikido. It then challenges me to make the things I feel are lacking, and improve on them...it's called growth.
Often times when we feel that the level we are on has stopped challenging us, and has stopped motivating us we come to a cross-roads, "Do I keep pursuing?" "Or do I quit?" There are days when I know that my Aikido is effective, and then there are days when I wonder...
There are days when Im at my dojo that I feel like "wow I really do that technique well" And then I go to my sensei's dojo and feel as though I am the biggest fraud ever.
But it is these types of days that should keep us
1) Honest, humble and not delusional
2) dedicated to perfecting the imperfections that we are questioning.
If I were you, I would think about taking what I see as in-effectivness and try to improve on it.
What makes "Aikido" "your aikido" ineffective? what should you have done, or could you have done?
Isn't it funny that Millions of people in the world practice Aikido, and yet you never see or hear of anyone using it in street situations....Budo = to stop war.??????
Maybe Aikido works to well?!?!?!?! ne?
Sometimes I work out with some BJJ and Judo guys, not to compete but to help me not be delusional. Some days these guys can't touch me, other days they own me, and I use the bad days to learn from my mistakes, and work on them.
No art is 100% "not even Bjj" this is why we are "students" of the arts; to study the art, find what works for us, and what doesn't and better ourselves, and not others.
Why should you care about what someone says about aikido or any other art, your opinions should be based on your personal study and not that of someone else's.
Do you think that after 5 years you have come to learn all that you are going to learn about your art? I would dare say that after 5 years you have probably just learned how to do your techniques without getting off balance.
I'll be quite now, but maybe you should think about these things before quitting. Because what happens when you change arts, and after 5 more years of beginning all over again, you spar with someone and they kick your butt? Do you say that art did not work as well? or in the event of starting all over again you do get into a fight in the street and that guy kicks your butt? I guess that art didn't work either?
I hope I don't sound like an ass and if I do, i'm sure my fellow aikidoka will let me know that I do, but these are just my opinions.
With all my love
Iesu wa shu