Robert Rumpf wrote:
How did you fail, though? Did you fail in the martial sense, or as a student? Those are two separate things.
It would seem to me that you failed as a student, and succeeded martially, while he, at least, failed martially, and probably failed as a student, since it seems it was done out of spite and ego and not to develop you or himself.
If Aikido is to live up to its goal of protecting both parties, nage must have enough control to keep uke from making bad decisions. This is the difference between leading and directing. Directing someone can feel like leading, but it's qualitatively different. If my only recourse for someone not following me is to do severe damage (eye gouging would count in my book) then my waza has already failed. This is why I don't like when people use atemi at the end of techniques or when they get stuck.