Thread: Fear in Aikido
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Old 09-11-2006, 11:28 AM   #20
Kevin Wilbanks
Location: Seattle/Southern Wisconsin
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 788
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Re: Fear in Aikido

Believe it or not, I stumbled on the general idea of Aikido in a dream, and it had a big effect on my fears of assault.

I had dreams all through my childhood and occasionally into adulthood that I would be in some kind of fight or situation where I needed to hit someone, but couldn't. When I tried, the air was like gelatin or sand and it deccelerated my limbs, rendering punches and kicks far too weak to do any damage - a variation on a classic dream. I also had zombie dreams where I had destructive power, but the zombies were nearly indestructible. The zombies had to be pretty near annihilated before they would quit. The dream would get really gross and I would get tired of doing gruesomely violent things to the them and wake up before I really got many to stop coming for me. I guess I can thank 'Night of the Living Dead' for those.

Anyway, one time I had a dream where several guys stole all my tools. I tracked them up to a second floor apartment. I wasn't scared of them because I was determined to retrieve my tools, I think. I burst in on them, and when they attacked me, I simply threw them out an open window, one by one. What I did was sort of like kokyu throws, although more simple and not really spiral, but circular and horizontal - a couple of times I swung a guy in a complete horzontal circle before tossing him out the window. It was nearly effortless and I felt good, and I don't think I ever had the weak punching dreams again. I may have still had some of the zombie dreams, but those eventually died out too.

At this time I had heard and maybe read a little about Aikido, but not much, and I don't think I even started practicing until at least two years later. It was interesting that in my mind I was at some sort of impasse with the idea of fights, which perhaps even had some symbolic and deeper psychological significance having to do with fear itself. I didn't run from the 'fights', but I couldn't win them. Then a third way came up, either borrowed from suggestion or 'discovered', in which I used a very Aikido-like strategy and movement principle, and in one dream the problem was gone.

Last edited by Kevin Wilbanks : 09-11-2006 at 11:31 AM.
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