Heh --- this is a lot like a little thing I posted to my AikiBlog not that long ago (my Sensei's contribution follows). I've removed the dojo-specific references, however...
---

This came about when, on my break at work yesterday, I
looked down and realized that I was walking around
holding my wallet and water bottle like I was gripping
a bokken. :-P

You know you're a hardcore Aikidoka when:

- ...the Aikido dreams start.

- ...you find yourself with an irresistible urge to
bow every time you enter or exit a room.

- ...the smell of rancid sweat has become oddly
unnoticeable to you.

- ...you immediately stop what you're doing and sit
down whenever you hear someone clap their hands.

- ...you feel like doing Yonkyo anytime someone
reaches to give you a handshake.

- ...you no longer grip anything with your index
fingers.

- ...you wear athletic tape and/or Neoprene braces
so often, they're practically fashion accessories.

- You blurt out "Hai!" when you're asked to do something at home, or at work.

- You wonder how you would flip someone in an elevator.

- You don't just open a door -- you extend into it from your center.

- Missing practice makes you feel like a caged animal.

- A crowded sidewalk always means tai sabaki practice.

- You've tried doing mai ukemi down a hill -- or on cement.

- Sensei regularly slams the bleep out of you.

- You actually want Sensei to slam the bleep out of you.