Michael O'Brien wrote:
Lynn, I've read your posts a couple of times now and while I feel I understand and agree with parts (the general flow) of it there is part I don't think I'm understanding. Perhaps I've just been at work to long and my brain is overloaded?
Are you talking about only training here or life in general? If we "let go" of our goal, desires, etc in life at that point don't we merely exist? Goals, desires, etc in life are what give us purpose and direction are they not?
Maybe I'm just not looking at it correctly tonight? I would love to hear your take on this further, and others as well. I know I have a lot to let go of for my training to evolve to the level that I desire.
IMHO, there are so many conceptual levels of training and life. They are just ways of thinking about it and certainly not the real thing. To me, training and life in general are not that different.
Yes, on one level goals and desires give us purpose and direction. On another level, it is the mental focus on goals and desires that block us from seeing and experiencing everything else.
Yes, on one level goals and desires define who we are and what we do. On another level, our identity is not in our "doing" or "making", but in our "being" and letting".
As you noted, the first part of our training is letting go of the past training and learning something new. My first couple years in Aikido was awful. Finally, the goal and desire is to let go of even that and "let" the techniques/identity/life happen. Sometimes, once you plot a course, you have to get out of the way and enjoy the journey getting there and quite possibly beyond. Its the journey that matters. There really is no goal or destination. There is no "there".
There is any underlying assumption that is already there, we just forget and get caught up in the learned mental ego identity. Its like a sculpture looking at a stone, sees whats already there, and takes away (lets go) of the unnecessary.
Words are so inadequate for this stuff. I only claim to have a belief in it and the occasional glimpse. I know I don't have it, but keep training to let a little bit go as often as I can.
Does that help to muddy the water some?