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Liane Guillou wrote:
I don't feel as if I have earnt it; I don't feel like I know enough Aikido...Has anyone else ever felt like this about a grade that they were given? Or have any teachers out there ever given a grade for a similar reason?.
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In all the exams I've taken over the past ten years, I've never felt as if I earned my belt, even when I took one for shodan. I'm always behind my own expectations for how I'm supposed to do. But here's the thing. My own expectations are irrelevant. Its my sensei who has the right to decide. To get hung up on your deserving or not deserving your belt is vanity in reverse. Get over it. Get back to training. It doesnt matter in the end.