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Old 07-27-2000, 11:33 AM   #20
Dojo: The Dojo (
Location: Bavaria
Join Date: Jun 2000
Posts: 78
well-meaning male/female interactions

I knew the technique already, my male partner obviously didnīt. So I started to offer corrections which were accepted. Until he asked me how long I was doing aikido already. At this time, I had been training for one and a half years (8 hours/ week). He answered proudly that he had been training (with long breaks) for about three years. From this moment he tried to corect me and insisted on his movements even when they were obviously wrong and dangerous. There was nothing I could do about this so I was glad when the technique was over.
Mostly if they want to instruct, I say "show me" give them their time, then say, "let me try" and we go on from there.
And hope the instructor walks over soon...
I'm happy to learn from anyone.
My reaction to any non-instructor who want to instruct me is to (1) give them the benefit of a doubt and (2) make sure some actual technique happens and not just blabbing.
Sometimes I think there's some kind of ego thing going on wherein the person is more comfortable telling you how to do it than actually doing it.
Yes, I see more males over-instructing, but I think everyone's guilty of it sometimes.
What really bothers me is females who are conditioned not to instruct or lead, even when asked. I had to get past it, perhaps that's why it just makes me go "argh!" inside.

I have also been known to initiate technique from blabbers by insisting on attacking them and making them "show me". I tell them I can't learn from words. Just throw me. This is true for me, and it saves me some trouble.

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