Mike Braxton wrote:
Some of the opinions on this matter concerns me. A lot of people seem to think that Frank was thrusted into the situation just because something happened in public and he happened to see it. For all the folks that think this way, the next time you happend to hold hands, give a quick kiss, pat the person in your life on the butt, etc... in public, don't be alarmed if everyone who saw the offense starts to give you their opinion on the matter. I think that this is rubbish. People are also assuming that the sensei's wife would be upset if she finds out about what happened and would ask for a divorce or that her husband might confront the sensei on the mat. There is no facts in evidence to support these assumptions. For all you know, she might have given him permission to seek a little on the side and the friends husband might be on the one cheating and doesn't care what the lady does. You go to the dojo to train and not follow the sensei's lifestyle or take on his religion, end of story. They are adults and its their business. Keep out of it.
While I don't agree with you, I wouldn't go so far as to call your opinion rubbish. What you expressed is a legitimate concern and is an opinion worthy of being heard and considered. I have worked in a field as a professional since 1976 counseling and helping people in this very area. I happen to know that a lot less than what I have mentioned in my post has burned down lifetime's worth of relationships. I didn't say anything lightly or without some thought and due consideration. Having said that, nothing said here is advice that should be taken to the letter or too seriously and your ideas have as much merit as mine do. "Frank" needs to place his priorities in deciding what to do with competent people he knows personally and trusts. All of us here are just respectfully talking to each other about what was presented as friends.