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Old 12-28-2005, 02:45 AM   #9
Neil Mick
Dojo: Aikido of Santa Cruz
Location: Santa Cruz, CA
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 225
Re: High level power abuse

OK, whoah. I was all nodding along and humming and hemming at various points in this thread until I hit upon this line:

I am indeed trying to speak with her but she is avoiding me, go figure. I will indeed think very carefully about speaking with Sensei if and when I do.
OK, I know nothing of your situation. But, here's my take on it:

Jim is right:

If the instructor and the student are adults and want to have an affair, that's their business. If they use the dojo to facilitate the affair, then it becomes dojo business.
I might also add: if you're trying to speak with her but she's avoiding you, that's YOUR business. I do not know your situation other than what you've offered, but I would back away from any entanglement involving you, your Sensei, and/or the woman in question.

Just as a general rule: you don't want to make other people's business, your's the makings for bad blood.

Now, if your Sensei is using the dojo as some sort of meeting-point, then yes: a talk with Sensei IS in order.

But if you saw them commit an indiscretion ONCE, well...! That's a little different.

To me, the question arises in often, how obvious, and to what degree is Sensei being indiscreet.

It affects my training and my training of the lower belts
But, how? That's what I don't get.

PS I have only been doing Aikido for just over 3 years…..did I hit some chord with the "un-Aiki" comment??
It is a term often misused to criticize all sorts of behaviours or actions. Just do a search of "un-aiki" in the aikiweb fora, to get a sense of what I mean.
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