Thread: underestimated
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Old 11-16-2005, 04:25 PM   #13
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Re: underestimated

My young woman, talk to your Sensei, talk you someone who is older and that you respect and look up to about this situation, it just doesn't pertain to the dojo.

Besides that sound advice, your situation brings up many other issues. Sadly, as we get older, respect isn't something easily come by. I have seen Aikidoka who have been in the art for years and are out of shape, over weight, and know little and get lots of respect. I see Aikidoka who are very talented, young, and ambiguous in their skill and get zero respect.

Not everyone is going to respect you, especially people new to your dojo, from different arts, of different skill, etc. Cops, judges, and the alike get little respect for their positions. The elderly get very little respect. Look around in your world and see who gets respect and why, you might find that the issue of respect is nothing more than a popularity contest.

When I was young there was a saying that respect was earned and not given. Maybe, in your case the type of respect you want is a result of your tolerance, and the respect you desire may be earned over time.

Personally, I am past the tender and fresh years of youth, and the need to be respected, like my youth, has long since past. Now, if a person respects me ( in the way you are concern with ), fine. If they don't respect me ( in the way you are concern with )fine. This is because over the years of not being respected as I wanted, I developed instead a good strong sense of myself, and who I am. In other-words, for me, I respect myself. I respect who I am, and what I have achieved inside and outside the dojo. many of us have been in your shoes, we know. Therefore, I am honest with myself, my abilities and that allows me to build and develop myself and who I am. That is the key for me, and is how I developed and maintain the same type of respect you seek.

FWIW.
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