Thread: underestimated
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Old 11-16-2005, 02:46 AM   #5
Sonja2012's Avatar
Dojo: Aikido Verein Esslingen
Location: Duisburg
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 193
Re: underestimated

Kevin Leavitt wrote:
Remember first you must influence yourself before you can influence others!
I second this. Nice post, Kevin.

Anon, I think many women (and men) can understand how you feel. Most of us have probably encountered being patronized and not being taken seriously on the mat. At your age, I guess you experience that even more, which is a shame. I myself had (and still have) huge issues with being treated in that way and I think I know how it must make you feel. For a long time I used to get terribly upset when people were like that and my reaction was to push back, meaning I thought that I should give them a taste of their own medicine and either correct them back or show them how strong my technique can be

Eventually I started to think about this in a different way and asked myself what it is in me that creates this reaction. They pushed my buttons and even though it was them pushing, they were still my buttons. So I figured that if I learn to understand my buttons as it were and maybe start working on them, then they can push as much as they like and it wonīt bother me. After all, it all comes down to my ego being hurt when people correct me. So, in a way I now think that when people behave like that, they offer me a chance to practice letting go of my ego. Donīt get me wrong - I am far away from being over this issue but it does bother me much less than before. Not only on the mat but also in every day life. And the funny thing is, it seems to happen less the more I get over it.

I donīt know if this helps at all. I hope you find your way of dealing with this and have more fun on the mat.

Best regards,
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