Re: HOW does aikido change us?
My opinion is that you need to develop sensitivity to yourself and your partner first. If you do this, and are thrown consistently by someone who can do it without ego, you can change. If you become more perceptive but there is even a hint of ego in the teacher's technique, then I think you'll need to look elsewhere for help. You also need to to be brutally honest with yourself, and continue to see the depths of your own ego for what it is, acknowledge it, and let it go - slowly but surely. What do you think?
Rob (sorry about my very on-the-mat answer)