Back in Britain the (Pythonesque) stories go something like this:
A. In my day...Chiba/Abbe Sensei would make us do 1,000 press ups on broken glass then tear our arms off and hit us with the wet ends.
B. That was nothing, my sensei would make us do 10, 000 press ups on our wrists, then crack our skulls with bokken and use our brains for sushi.
A. You were lucky! Sensei would kill us before we got in the dojo (which was a shoe box in a cess pit) with rusty katana, resurrect us with 100, 000 press ups, then kill us again by shihonageing our intestines...
B. Intestines. Luxury...we dreamed of being shihonaged by intestines, our sensei used our testicles...etc
A. And kids today don't believe us!
Disclaimer: Many of the stories told my senior British Sensei are absolutely true, and just because I'm 4000 miles away doesn't mean I'm taking the mickey