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Old 05-28-2005, 12:14 PM   #25
"jon"
IP Hash: e5a5788c
Anonymous User
Re: Aikido A Place to Find True Love?

Anne,

BTW, forgot to say good advice as an option toward the end of your last post.

If a woman leaves the dojo because of an uncomfortable situation concerning a guy, I am sure there are men who can say the same thing about woman. Feeling uncomfortable as a result of a mismatch isn't just something woman experience. Men experience it too. Men are driven away by some woman as well.

We can't fairly judge from one particular personality of a woman who responded to the situation by leaving the dojo, because of how she felt about the situation. Another woman with a different personality may not have left the dojo, and dealt with the situation differently. Another woman have reacted differently, such as not feeling so intensely uncomfortable about the situation. Another woman may have felt more strongly about Aikido to work things out differently and not leave the class, and not make her only option to leave the dojo. Not all woman are made from the same mold. Each woman like men are individual personalities with different backgrounds and behaviors and they shouldn't be generalized by anyone's perspective. Matters in the dojo, are a case by case situation, where each individual should be respected as an individual and not stereotyped by gender behavior. Behavior is changeable.

We can't generalize or cater to one woman's ( or man's) reaction or situation that you described for that of all woman. Thereby setting rules and standards for all to go by. That isn't fair to all the woman around the world that come from different places and experiences. Woman are unique. They like men will bond with common experiences, personalities, and likes, but this doesn't make them the same. Nor should we treat them all the same.

What a disaster and mess it would be if we did, especially on the mat. Or when looking for love. Dating on the mat isn't a sin. Finding love in Aikido isn't a slight against all woman when a mismatch occurs, and a woman leaves the dojo. Lots of people leave the dojo for alots of other reasons too. But like the poet said, "it is better to love and lost then not to love at all. It's that the dynamic of life and of Aikido to train not only the body but the character.
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