First of all, i'd like to point out that i've only been doing Aikido for a few months and i've only ever taken one grading, so most of the time, everyone is showing me what to do. I have no problem with that, i'm grateful to them. However, last night i was working with an orange belt (4th kyu- I think?) and we were doing shio-nage (sp?) with the Jo. he couldn't get it to work, because he was skiing (sp?) the jo at the wrong knee, and then trying to do it, which meant-this is kinda hard to explain- he kept ending up w/ my arm stretched straight out in front of me instead of twisted up. I said that i thought it was the other knee, and he replied "Don't worry, it's because you're not bending your arm, its what makes women bad drivers." Was i wrong to speak up? And also, should the uke willingly bend their arm?
I think in the beginning there's too much that can overwhelm analysis. My suggestion, don't worry about when things don't go as planned. It happens all the time.
As Uke give your best attack, with intention, with determination. If things don't work out for Nage, and you "know" what's happening you could speak up if that's ok in your class (local customs vary). But beware, since a frustrated Nage can bite back out of irritation.
Personally I wouldn't be offended either by your comment nor by the response (which is BS in my mind). Later Nage may realize that you were right.
Sometimes the point just doesn't make it across. Don't beat yourself up over it.
In my opinion, advice, unless requested, should be kept to yourself. Also in my opinion, his reply was sexist, and would have worked just fine without the reference to how how he perceives women's driving skills.
On the subject of uke willingly bending their arm: they should keep a small bend, and at all costs avoid locking it out straight. That kind of action is stupid ukemi begging for a broken or dislocated elbow. If your arm was locked out during the exercise, that may be what the problem was, vs at which knee he chose to tsuki, and you are lucky you still have use of it.
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