Well, I tested last night. To generally summarize....

The feedback I received was very good and the things to work on were mainly involved in increasing my connection while deeper in the technique. It seems I have a tendency to pause at the end of an otherwise excellent blend and allow uke to recover too much of their balance before finishing the technique. After reviewing my notes from prior tests, it strikes me an issue (improved) that I have been working on all along with respect to dealing with my fear of injuring my partners. While a lot of that fear has been dealt with, there are some definite bad habits remaining from when it was more significant.

My teachers also appreciated that I have for the most part successfully managed to maintain a search for effectiveness without using overt muscle and that Aikido is also more than just effective technique to me.

For my part, I didn't really feel like I got to do the kind of preparation for this test I was intending or thought I'd do going into it. For a variety of reasons, life has been very full for me recently (new job, new relationship) and I've had to back off from my prior degree of commitment in order to balance the other things in my life. So, to me, my intensity of training is really down from last year... last year I aspired to train every day. This last six months or so, I've been lucky to get 15-20 days a month in. Still quite respectable, but it FEELS like I'm not training hard enough due to my former practice levels. Also, I got sick twice (flu, then strep), broke a toe, and gained 20 pounds.

I've managed to put off 10 of those 20, but my endurance was still too low and I ended up getting through the jiyu-waza and randori on the test through sheer will power and can't really remember much beyond the first technique in each one. I mainly concentrated on not falling down, trying to breathe, and moving. I was too weak to do anything else. One of my seniors (sandan) told me that I had already done my preparation last year with the daily training and many many seminars and that I should just focus on maintaining my training and attitude since circumstances prevented the preparation I desired.

Over all, I think I did ok. Mentally, I treated the test like I was training in a regular class. I do plan to try not to allow this sort of minimal preparation to occur for my shodan test. At least if I'm not struggling to stand due to lack of endurance I can actually do a little more.

Tarik

[Edited by tarik on June 8, 2000 at 2:20pm]

Just to follow up on his review, I would have to say that Tarik performed quite well considering the state of his endurance. He out performed anything that I could even consider doing, and while I am his junior in rank, I still aspire to a more perfect attitude in training. I can only hope that I do half as well when I get to his level.

jeff

More perfect? What does that mean?

Tarik

PS - The check's in the mail.

Hey, I was tired and on drugs. What d'ya expect?

jeff

Vicadin is no excuse... besides, that still doesn't explain what you meant?

Tarik

Come now, let's not start any flame wars :)...

-Nick

There's a difference between dedicated and prepared, and obsessive-compulsive :)
I once read a letter in Aikido Today from someone who said they continually wanted to do a kyu test over and over because they felt they didn't get it right. In a sense that's arrogance, not humility, because it disregards the opinion of someone wiser than you (your sensei) who told you when you should test. In my experience, when you're told to test, you're already there. This doesn't detract from the seriousness or the "stage fright" some have of being "on" in front of an audience of your peers, superiors, et al., but harmony is also balance.
An illustration: when I was a teen-ager I played a lot of golf. I realized I could play every day in the summer, so I did. I got much worse. Why? Instead of playing and being in the game, I started to analyze my backswings, my breathing, etc., and broke everything into "parts" which also broke my game apart. You can do the same with aikido. Aikido techniques are like flowing water, not the segmented frames in a film strip.
Enjoy practice. There's enough seriousness in what you do off the mat, achieve in that world, "live" and be "alive" on the mat!

Definitely the case in our dojo.

Stage fright is really no longer an issue for me. I've done that often enough that it's just training. It can be more intense training depending on what is asked, but it's still just training.

I don't know. I think Aikido technique can benefit from such a break down into pieces. Certainly one can overdo it, but if you're foot is being placed in the wrong place, that is ultimately the quickest way to learn and change it.

But of course. Enjoyment doesn't preclude me from doing my best, though.

Tarik

No flame war, just a simple question. What does it mean [to Jeff] to aspire to a more perfect attitude?

Tarik