I'm not sure whether this should be a separate thread but I thought it relates to being too hard or soft an Uke.

I hope I can explain this clearly enough.

After training, over tea and choc chip cookies, we were discussing the connection and relationship between uke and nage in the dojo.

We got to talking about "feeling the techniques" as both Uke and Nage. Sensei made the comment that both Uke and Nage are trying to nuture the energy during training and not "destroying" it. By that he meant not slamming Uke to the floor so that Uke is reticent about training but rather guiding Uke into proper Ukemi. Uke creates the energy from a committed attack. All the while maintaining clear intent whether we be Uke or Nage. In this way we are training cooperatively.

Now that got me thinking about the people that I have trained with in the past and currently.

Scenario 1

There have been those where it has been a joy to ukemi because their intent as Nage was so clear. No matter how vigourously I attacked or how powerfully I was thrown I was always in the correct position for the Ukemi. I would hit the mat hard, but I would get back up and think "WOW!! How did he do that? That was great" and then continue. I would never feel at risk of being injured and in this way training was an absolute joy.

Scenario 2

There have been other times training with other people where I would hit the mat hard and get the wind knocked out of me. I didnt feel confident and sometimes I would be in fear of serious injury. Training would be just as vigourous but the feeling would be very different.

I was wondering if anyone in this forum has felt that way during vigourous and rigourous training.

Also I've read some comments on this forum that O'Sensei could be quite harsh with his uchi deshi. On the other hand I've also read on this forum that training should be joyous. So is there a contradiction here? (I guess the assumption that I'm making here is that the harsh treatment by O'Sensei was no t acceptable by his uchi deshi).

Is the first scenario a valid means to practice aikido as a budo form or are we fooling ourselves? Is that sense of "putting ourselves at risk" (for want of a better phrase) and tension a necessary part of training?

Anyone got any thoughts about this?

We once had a person in our group. He never attacked me (nor anyone else) with any effort. Not even my Gi would move if he'd hit it. It turned out that he wasn't all that keen on practising, but it was his father that wanted him to practise. We don't take studens younger than 15, and this guy was probably not a day over 16. He never said much and was very timid. My guess is that he was very "hard kept" (can you say it like that in English, or does it make no sence?) by his father... Eitherway he quit after a year.

I have no deep thoughts about this subject, but perhaps there are sometimes more reasons for a persons behaviour, than meets the eye.

/Patrik