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This poem and others are available in my books, Nothing Works: Meditations on Aikido, Buddhism, the Tao, Zen, and other inconsequential things....and, Nothing Special, and Nothing Matters..., available thru Amazon.com, in print and Kindle editions and Barnes & Noble websites.....Also available as an e-book via Smashwords.com. Try this link: www.nothing-works.com for the full array of options.
Tilting the whiskey bottle
Up to my thirsty lips
The last dregs trickle
Down a throat long parched
Looking down inside
The long empty bottle
The bottom looks back
I see the enso at its base
Telling me that I have found
The nothingness I have
Always looked for
I am the Buddha
And I die
This is change
This is natural
I lie down
And I die
No miracle happens
I die
And the world goes on
Side by side with death
As always
It is hard to miss
The toll of the bells
Though I gotta admit
I tend to lose count
Does this mean my prior
Years' sins are not forgiven?
Best I can do is not
Choke on my mochi After all that sake And sweet amazake The night before on Omisoka - New Year's Eve
Still my first sunrise -- Hatsuhinode, should be
Something, as should be Hatsugeiko -- my first
Aikido practice later that day
Traditionally, we usually toss
Each other 108 times, though I
Tend to lose count here too
Guess I'm destined to carry
My sins forward, as usual
It was one of those moments
Walking, the sky the color
Of an old used ice rink
Snow falling, falling heavily
When it seemed to hesitate
Hesitate in mid-air
Everything seemed to slow down
A second or a century
Could have passed by
I could see individual snow flakes
Slowly turning as they fell
Detailed structures, oh, so apparent
Everything was so clear
Click, and the moment was gone
I always remember such moments
Such rare moments
And crave their return
Nirvana calling
Really...
Settle back....breathe
Nothing else....breathe
Belief is not required
Forget the Bodhi tree
Forget the masters
In fact, forget everything
Forget breathing
Just do it
Just...
I look into the mirror
And see my great enemy -
Myself -
Mara, the Demon Lord
Brings forth his hosts -
Lures and temptations...
But, I sit immovable
Till only myself remains
And I see the world
And myself for what they are
At times
At times I lost my certainty
At times I feared I was wrong
At times I was totally confused
At times I got very, very tired
At times the cosmic wind
Seemed weak, nebulous
A vague dream I once had
Insubstantial, unreal...
At such times, I looked deep
Looked deep within myself
My life before and after
My memories, all my experiences
I looked all around me
At the world, at its condition
At such times, I gathered my resolve
Following that faint thread
Back to its cosmic source
And found the light once again
Waiting