Welcome to AikiWeb Aikido Information
AikiWeb: The Source for Aikido Information
AikiWeb's principal purpose is to serve the Internet community as a repository and dissemination point for aikido information.

Sections
home
aikido articles
columns

Discussions
forums
aikiblogs

Databases
dojo search
seminars
image gallery
supplies
links directory

Reviews
book reviews
video reviews
dvd reviews
equip. reviews

News
submit
archive

Miscellaneous
newsletter
rss feeds
polls
about

Follow us on



Home > AikiWeb Aikido
Go Back   AikiWeb Aikido Forums > AikiWeb AikiBlogs > ikkainogakusei's Blog

Hello and thank you for visiting AikiWeb, the world's most active online Aikido community! This site is home to over 22,000 aikido practitioners from around the world and covers a wide range of aikido topics including techniques, philosophy, history, humor, beginner issues, the marketplace, and more.

If you wish to join in the discussions or use the other advanced features available, you will need to register first. Registration is absolutely free and takes only a few minutes to complete so sign up today!

ikkainogakusei's Blog Blog Tools Rate This Blog
Creation Date: 02-12-2003 09:07 PM
ikkainogakusei
Offline
rss2
Blog Info
Status: Public
Entries: 17
Comments: 33
Views: 50,612

In General ego...rank...makoto...musubi Entry Tools Rate This Entry
  #6 New 03-26-2003 07:27 PM
Another student has, at various times, engaged me in a conversation about ego and rank. He says that we shouldn't consider either important.

I find it interesting because I have observed his interaction with the very new students and noticed that he tends to bark at them if they make a mistake. He never gives eye contact or recignizes them in a 'human' manner, he often attempts to correct my technique, to which I smile and nod, even though it isn't the instruction given by sensei, and he has even said that sensei is wrong at times.

I find that when I watch his movements it seems that he yanks stiffly through technique, which I find ironic because it to me reflects his personality type even in his conversational style. I have found that he will say something extreme and require an answer.

What is most challenging to me is that I respond to him in ways that I don't often do with others.

When he says 'sensei was wrong...' I find myself saying back 'By definition, sensei is never wrong...' Which isn't really true, and I don't think sensei would even agree to that. But I find that he makes these assertions about areas which he totally is uninformed enough to make a judgement, and he does it in front of the new students.

When he says 'there should be no ego...' I smile and nod, but I want to ask him if he's really prepared to embrace that. Could he take feedback from another student, even one who is dohai (equi-ranked), let alone a sempai? Over and over I have seen him bow to sensei after correction and go right back to doing what he was doing in the first place.

My general feeling about rank is that it is important that a student understand the etiquette in aikido enough so that if they go to another school, they will be able to navigate the requirements enough so that they won't be labeled a rube, and be associated as a rube from our school.

When we have trained together I have faltered in my aiki training at times and froze him out purely because he is trying to dominate through his technique. It hasn't happened every time, but when I see him rough up another student, I feel a want to not affirm that, yet really I wonder if I am reinforcing it.

When he first started training at this school, he used to try to throw in shihonage without bringing wrist to shoulder. To which I said 'Stop' and told him that he risks damaging my shoulder or elbow. He stopped and looked confused '...but that's how it's done.' he said. And from then on he would say that it was my shoulders which were weak and damaged.

In my attempt to keep community-minded, I have endeavoured to volunteer whenever possible to the needs of the school. Again I find my ai-keiko challenged because this guy had insisted that I also attend to his needs. Like immedaitely responding to his emails about things which only sensei could answer.

So I feel like my attention is kidnapped in a way, and I resent it. I know that part of my work is to address humility, partly because ego to me was one of my defenses as a kid in a harsh environment.

I wonder if what I see in him is a more extreme case of what I am trying to resolve in me. Not that I try to hurt other students, or dominate them, I've had positive feedback from students and kohai in terms of training and teaching. Maybe that I wonder where I am clueless to stepping on the toes of others, or where I might come off as too egotistical.

I try to be sincere in my actions. I try to find connection. It is a challenge to let go.
Views: 2310



All times are GMT -6. The time now is 12:31 AM.



vBulletin Copyright © 2000-2024 Jelsoft Enterprises Limited
----------
Copyright 1997-2024 AikiWeb and its Authors, All Rights Reserved.
----------
For questions and comments about this website:
Send E-mail
plainlaid-picaresque outchasing-protistan explicantia-altarage seaford-stellionate