en Sat, 04 Jul 2009 20:26:31 GMT Sat, 04 Jul 2009 07:38:27 GMT http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss vBlogetin aw_forums@aikiweb.com aw_forums@aikiweb.com Sat, 04 Jul 2009 07:38:27 GMT Class 8, I believe, was last Tuesday evening.

I've been a bit slow putting together enough connected thoughts about it to make a proper blog post. Now I'm just giving up and blurting out some unconnected things.

First, I got a surprise at my PT appt on Monday. My PT was very happy, told me to cancel my upcoming appointment, and gave me the go-ahead to roll, fall, and whatever else I want to do. "But if you land on that shoulder again, don't come crying to me."

Class was on Tuesday. I figured it would be best to start with rolling practice (solo only, I mean), and just do back rocking-falls (not all the way over) as uke. I wasn't quite confident enough to do forward rolls out of techniques. That seemed like a conservative and rational plan.

Strange though, how our brains are not rational. I say "easy, soft rolls that I was doing quite happily and with confidence before I got injured, so no problem." Brain, on the other hand, says "Uh, no way. We're gonna die." So I was thinking too much, and being too cautious and tense, and nothing worked well (except the sitting-backwards-and-rocking-back kinds of falls). I couldn't do a simple slow back roll to save my life. Have you seen that Garfield (the cat) cartoon where John (the owner) asks Garfield how he manages all 4 feet when he walks, and Garfield gets to thinking about it, and then can't walk because he's so confused? It felt like that.

Well, OK, I did *one* back roll very nicely after class, but when I tried to do it again, it was gone. I rolled on my spine, and thunked my head on the mat, and rolled with my shoulders stiff. The more I tried to get it right, the more I got it wrong. No injuries - I didn't do any damage - but my brain got to say "See, I was right! I told you it was going to hurt." This could be an interesting downward spiral if I don't get it stopped, pronto.

I didn't do much better with anything else in class, either. Thank goodness there were a few brand new students, so we went slowly over some really simple stuff. Over, and over, and over. Which I really needed. There were a couple of things that finally started to click.

Strangely, I could not grasp irimi. The simplest thing ever. I kept stepping too far, turning too much, turning the wrong way. I wonder if we get any better at learning as we age? Something got me thinking this morning about learning to write letters as a little kid. Do you remember doing drills, following examples, tracing letters, and practicing, practicing, practicing? One would think you could hear "Look, it's like a pointy teepee, with a bar across the middle," and that would be it. But it took ages, and it wasn't easy. Aikido feels like that. A lot of it is simple, but for some reason it's hard to remember "oh yeah, I step *this* way..."

Another thing this class pointed out (strongly) is that I'm pathetically out of shape aerobically-speaking. We did the same throw many times near the end of class, in a pretty good rhythm. I grab left, I go down, I grab right, I go down, you grab left, I throw you, you grab right I throw you, repeat. That was great, because it finally started to really flow, without thinking. But dangit I need to spend a lot more time on the elliptical trainer.

Speaking of which, I asked my PT about setting up an ongoing exercise program I can do at home (correctly), for strength and flexibilty, so my muscles are supporting my joints, so I can hold myself in proper posture for more than 2 minutes, etc. He referred me to a trainer who is a PT herself (and so won't have me doing stupid things that will just get me injured). I've got two sessions with her the week after next. Very excited about that.

Next week I'm off work, so I might get to do a few extra classes. I'm hoping I can convince my brain that it can shut up and just let the body relax and roll. "Thank you for sharing, brain. You can sit down now." ]]> Linda Eskin Thu, 02 Jul 2009 03:14:20 GMT The canvas accepts the paint
yet the paint itself leaves no mark.
Brush strokes
are rendered and disappear
as soon as they are completed.
The painting can be finished,
and still,
leave no shadow of itself
on the canvas
which is always blank.

On the mat
my mind,
like the canvas,
is undisturbed;
accepting the attack,
which leaves no memory
to note its having happened.]]> RonRagusa Mon, 29 Jun 2009 01:51:04 GMT so.... I went on a study aroud program to London and was hoping to make some frineds or at lest some acutence. while the city has keept its part of being butaful and intrging.... the other area well has come and pasted. I am scared that if I can not even do it when I am forced to hang out with thises people and they are nice 24 7 then ... well i must be the problem and it hurts and am having a heard time giting past that. I knwo that some of it i just need to inore but need people . so its heard. I need soem tips on how to just not care.]]> trademark8806 Fri, 26 Jun 2009 05:58:18 GMT I have been working on this project for about 2 months and been getting great support and references from all the aikidoka here. I was wondering i would like some feedback from everyone to help me here . is there enough interest on Aikido on the big island to warrant a possible book ? I am a novice at this and have no journalism skills just a digital recorder and a desire to find history . What would be great questions to ask the senior aikidoka here ? I have found some very interesting facts and stories from a lot of them and some great lost pictures too . Please some feedback would be much appreiciated. Thank you .]]> jamie yugawa Thu, 25 Jun 2009 06:32:51 GMT I am a martial artist. The more I train, the more I come to realize this: I am a martial artist. I'm not a fighter. I'm not a tough guy. Challenge me all you like, I refuse to take you on. Despite my temper, I hate confrontation.

I don't like physically hurting people. No really, I don't. When I verbally hurt someone out of anger, I end up hurting myself with guilt and a lot of I-shouldn't-haves. I'd hate to think what my conscience would do were I to deliberately use physical force on a person simply because I was angry. Despite the dark attraction I have for violence, the thought of actually becoming a violent person, with all its karma, terrifies me.

So why do I practice martial arts? Why cross train in Aikido and Arnis? Why spend countless hours sweating and breathing hard, swinging sticks, hitting targets, applying locks and throws, getting thrown and pinned and getting up every time?

I don't know. I do know that I am an artist. This is my chosen art. My medium is not paint and canvas. My medium is the movement of my body, my brushes are my sticks and hands, my canvas, myself.

My art is not a solitary art, although I do train solo from time to time. It is a collaborative art - together with my opponent, we create that which we deem beautiful albeit brutal. We do not fight - not even when we actively try to hit/pin/throw each other. Rather, we play our respective roles to the best of our abilities, in the quest of making something together. Many times we find ourselves laughing while taking turns tossing and being tossed through the air, many times we smile while tapping out to the pain of a well-applied lock. And when I get one good hit on the rubber tire with my stick: WHAPAK! YES! AGAIN!

I am a martial artist. Yes, my skills can be used to defend my loved ones as well as myself. But when it comes to protecting my family, I believe preventing/avoiding a situation where I might have to use my martial skills is more effective than any of the techniques I have in my arsenal. So I would rather fight by not fighting, win by not having to win in the first place.

Why? Because I am not a fighter. I am not a tough guy.

I am a martial artist.]]> wideawakedreamer Wed, 24 Jun 2009 13:04:54 GMT 23rd June 09

A hot, sweaty and intensive session - the weather has been particularly warm lately and the church hall was like an oven when we arrived

Only myself and one of our soon-to grade for the first time students turned up for class, so we did some 'polishing' for his upcoming 6th kyu test...

It was very useful for me to run through the basics again, as they are not identical to what I learned before, and I don't want to give anybody in my dojo wrong information!

Sensei trained in a group of 3 with us, and it was hard going for unfit me I had to have a puff of the inhaler as the pollen count is very high and I get hayfever related asthma sometimes when I exercise. However, I kept going, as improving my fitness is one of my goals in Aiki

I was struggling with kotegaeshi omote, as usual... One day it will make sense... I was also messing up on nikyo ura - until I paid attention to Sensei's initial movement and realised that I needed to get uke's balance by drawing their arm out a little rather than trying to skip around their back immediately In the UKA this technique starts like ikkyo ura - in previous styles it was generally applied right away, so more brain-re-training needed

Our other student was screwing shihonage on me pretty tightly, and doing the old 'flushing the chain' to end the technique Sensei corrected this and made sure he was moving forward to throw rather than stepping back. My ukemi wasn't coping with the technique being applied at an awkward angle, but as he got the wrist more into his centre it started feeling much more under control and less sore

Today I have sore arms and a nice bruise on my wrist I am not as tough as I used to be! Sensei asked me at the end if I was wanting to grade under the UKA. I said I wasn't particularly keen to, as I've done enough gradings in my time and am not bothered about doing another - I just want to train Sensei said he just wanted to check what my expectations were, which was very good of him I honestly doubt I will be able to get into shape to survive a UKA dan grading (I've seen enough of them at Summer School to know what is expected) and I'm not as young as I used to be The trouble is, I don't look my age - I'll be 40 in two and a half years time and I look about 27 My body feels more like 45 with the inactivity over the last 2 years

The other issue is the cost - a Hombu ratified dan grading is expensive I've always been quite happy to take off the hakama and wear a white belt when training with other organisations, so it's not the trophy for me!

At the end of class I discovered that my gi bottoms (my dad's old judogi ones from the 1960s) had ripped badly across both knees, so I've ordered a new aikidogi (size 4.5 - unfortunately my size 4 gis don't fit so well anymore ) which should fit. In the meantime I'd better get the sewing machine out and patch the judogi knees...]]> ruthmc Wed, 24 Jun 2009 05:17:56 GMT This was class #7, I believe.

I had been figuring (based on what my PT had said a couple of weeks ago) that I'd be out for a few more weeks yet. But yesterday both he and my orthopedic Doc put me through the ringer with exercises and x-rays, and both agreed I was doing great, and could go back to class. No rolling or falling yet, but anything else that doesn't hurt is fair game. I even showed Doc a video (on my iPod) from my dojo, to be sure he understood what Aikido was. He thought I was nuts to want to do that (he's hilarious), but didn't think my shoulder would be in danger.

I tried some gentle warm-ups from class at home last night, as a sanity check, and that went well. So tonight I joined in, instead of just watching.

I kinda figured I would make it partway through (a 90-minute class), and would start to get sore/ouchy, but noooo.... I did fine. Everyone was very considerate in their techniques, and really nothing hurt at all. I'm just giddy.

The exercises I've been able to do (both strengthening, and mental/awareness kind of things) have made a huge difference. (Many thanks to everyone who suggested things to do, and cautioned me about things to not do, in response to a question I asked on the Forums this past week!) I don't feel any of the muscle pain I did in the first few classes, and felt more stable and solid during class.

I was especially encouraged right from the start (during a pre-class 15-minute meditation period), when my right knee did not hurt. It was chonically stiff. Seiza hurt, and sitting cross-legged hurt more. I've been doing lots of warming up, stretching, and massage, and it's been getting better. Tonight, not even a twinge.

There were even a few moments when I felt glimmers of competency. I'm still a tangle of arms and legs, all going in the wrong directions (bless Sensei's patient heart, and my fellow students), but every now and then I got them a little bit organized and did the right thing, more or less.

I'm not letting up on the ice packs, exercises, stretches, or PT, but meanwhile, I'm very encouraged, and looking forward to next Tuesday.
Linda]]> Linda Eskin Tue, 23 Jun 2009 12:36:16 GMT 19th June 09

Tonight we'd reserved for dojo maintainence, as there was a 6 inch tear along the seam of the canvas, and several tatami needed taping up. Afterwards would be a short class if there was time...

The haberdashery in my town's department store recommended a pack of general purpose tough repair needles (hippo spears ) and linen thread to do the canvas repair. The thread was great because it matched the canvas exactly, and apparently is also used to mend shoes

I took my metal sewing thimble, and tried out a few different sizes of hippo spear needle on the canvas to see which one would work best... the thinnest needle began to bend quickly, so I picked the next size up which was spear-pointed like a leather needle.

Even so, it was the toughest repair job I have ever done - my blood and sweat went into it, but no tears It took me the full 2 hours, so Sensei took the rest of the class to the end of the hall to do weapons on the sports hall floor as they finished the taping job more quickly!

Fortunately my fingers have mostly healed and my thumb tips no longer feel like they've gone 10 rounds with a meat tenderizer... My back feels better too after running around helping out at my archery club's open tournament all weekend - sitting hunched on the floor isn't good, but with a canvas that size there was no other option

I'm pretty pleased with how it turned out, but the true test will be next Friday when we unfold the canvas and tension it around the frame, and of course train upon it ]]> ruthmc Mon, 22 Jun 2009 17:50:08 GMT Saturday night was a watershed moment in my training. There wasn't a fight or anything like that. In seven years of training I've changed beyond all recognition. The shy, angry, ignorant, insecure person that walked into my Sensei's dojo seven years ago has died. The last vestiges of him slipped peacefully away about 12am on saturday night.

I feel this break with the past and the hours since then have been spent mulling over how I got here. The answer is budo. I am obsessed with it and it dominates my thinking. I'm hesitant to say Aikido though, I don't think it's O-Sensei's message that has got me here, not on it's own. For me budo is practical, it is how I live my life.
The attitudes I display towards uke is the attitude I take with me into life day to day and the attitude I have towards training is the attitude I have towards life as a continuing process.

In the face of uke you must act decisively, you must end the situation before it can get out of hand, nip it in the bud. He must not even be allowed to complete his attack. Half way through shomen he should hit the mat.

You must be filled with resolve and admit no doubt into your mind. No limiting thought can be allowed to dwell in your head, you must enter in boldly. You must embody "katana ore ya mo tsuki."

I always think of my mind as my spear, my physical Aikido as my sword, and my game as my yoroi doshi (cuz once the spear has got her where I want her I draw my yoroi doshi and I go up and under the armour or through a gap in it and straight for her heart ) if I loose one weapon or if it isn't appropriate I draw another and another and another until I win.
I use everything at my disposal. And I'm always seeking to add weapons, every new skill is a weapon in your arsenal. And you must constantly be sharpening and looking after your weapons. My sword is not complete, but with every class, with every correction sensei makes it becomes more complete.
Confidence is my armour. To make armour I should imagine requires hammering a lot of metal, confidence is born out of getting a lot of hammering and coming through it. Each hammer blow might be tiny but it makes the armour stronger.

You must, however, be aware of what is going on, you can not just be bloody minded and push through regardless, that leads to your own destruction. You have to be in tune with reality, aware of your ability and aware of ukes ability, aware of the circumstances.

In life you must be continually growing. You have to have the guts to look at yourself in the mirror and see everything that's wrong with you and you have to train yourself up to remove these negative aspects. Just like in training, if your shiho nage has a flaw you can't just accept it and move on, you acknowledge the flaw and correct it.

You also have to have the wisdom to see all the good bits too, there's no point beating yourself up. Imagine if you went training and all sensei did was lay into you. Wouldn't be training long, would you?
In fact you shouldn't really get emotionally involved with your problems, there's no point, you're in the process of getting rid of them, why get emotionally attached? Just let them die.

Then you apply this thinking not only to yourself but to the rest of the world. You want something? Go train yourself up for it and go and get it. When I realised that I could do this I thought to myself "The world is a candy shop, and I have daddy's credit card."
It occurs to me writing this now that I have the shop keeper at spear point, therefore, I de facto own the shop.

Then when you have this training you know what to do, you know when and where you can resolutely push through and when and were you can push all you want and get no where. At this point you can still be slowed down, unexpected things will show up, things you have not trained for. But you can learn from that, modify your training and push forward. You become unstoppable, each trip, each fall only makes you better prepared in the long run.
Your mental weapons, your skills, unlike steel weapons, do not become blunt through use, they become ever sharper, ever more effective.

If you only have the resolve to keep trying and the wisdom to learn and adapt to circumstances victory is certain. Resolve is the easy bit too.

"I can't do this" is the single most stuipid thought ever to pass through the human mind. "I've tried, I can't do it" is the second most stupid thought. Try a different way. Try a different henka of the technique, try a different technique. Have you tried all the henka of all the techniques? No, so you haven't tried and failed, you've made a half arsed effort and wussed out. Are you sure you were trying correctly? A crap technique will not work even if attempted a million times.

The point is, how do you know you can't do it? How do you know you've given it a serious shot at trying. Well it's very difficult. So "I've tried, I can't do it" is a very bold statement. In that case, since in all honesty you haven't really tried, why would you give up?

As we say in budo "Just train."]]> Ketsan