Women & girls in Aikido

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[guest37503]

I think most of the time women take Aikido for different reasons than men. (if you're a woman reading this, I don't need to explain.)
I wanted to know, have you ever been attacked and been able to defend yourself? I have read Women in Aikido, but I want to know if there are any non-black belts who have been able to fend off someone.

If any woman wants to respond, black belt or not, I would be very interested.

Thanx for reading!
~Cecile

[Erik]

Originally posted by Cecile Schaefer
I think most of the time women take Aikido for different reasons than men. (if you're a woman reading this, I don't need to explain.)
I wanted to know, have you ever been attacked and been able to defend yourself? I have read Women in Aikido, but I want to know if there are any non-black belts who have been able to fend off someone.

If any woman wants to respond, black belt or not, I would be very interested.


Not sure if you want guys responding but I can give you a story involving a woman. A 6th or 5th kyu (don't remember) disarmed a knife with a sankyo. Guy came up behind her as she was opening her trunk left the knife hand available and she popped a sankyo on him. I think she just reacted without thinking but I don't remember what she did with the guy or the knife. She was former LAPD and definitely a fiesty sort but it's at least one story for you.

Say hello to Seth for me, but don't hold me against him.

[guest1234]

i never considered taking a MA for self defense, and that includes Aikido... i think you are implying that's why most women take it...i would say a lot of us don't take it for that reason. still, i have a little story.

i encouraged a date to take 'no' for an answer, although not a classic technique. He tried pushing me back on the sofa, the week after we'd been taught how to do something like kokyuho but beginning with uke pinning nage to the mat. I got up, started to leave (big mistake, turning my back), and he came up behind me, wrapping me in a bear hug and pinning me against a sofa table. The only thing i could reach was his thumb, so i twisted it the same way my sempai twisted mine if i let my thumb cross their palm while pinning them. He told me Aikido was 'the work of Satan'...
now, he wasn't a whole lot bigger than i (170 to 110), and i don't think either of us was going to fight to the death over this, but it worked...i'd been doing Aikido about a year

[guest37503]

Wow, thank you so much for responding! It is so comforting to hear these stories.

I think Aikido involves more than just dealing with the physical confrontation, it also trains you to avoid the confrontation and to deal with it psychologically. I think someone can use Aikido with just a firm and confident "no". Aikido, to me, can be the way you walk, the way you carry yourself.

An ironic thing happened to me when I was about 14. I had been taking Aikido for 2 years and I had to sit outside the dojo for a while until it opened. This girl walked by a few times and saw me alone and tried to bully me for some reason. First she tried verbal abuse. I laughed and said to her "Do you see where you are? You're trying to bully me in front of a martial art school." I don't think she quite got it.
I asked her why she wanted to start a fight, and I asked her who was bullying her in her life. She said something vicious & I stood up & told her to leave. She tried to slap me or something & I moved and it slipped right into a Nikyo. Immediatly she was begging for me to let her go & that she wouldn't bother me again.
It felt like my body was reacting without my having to make a conscious decision.

I would see her walk by the dojo sometimes during class & she would smile in the nicest way. My Sensei even asked if she was a friend of mine!

So anyways, thanx for responding and yes, even guys can share stories!

~Cecile

[guest1234]

good for you, perhaps one day your 'friend' will join your dojo...
that is what i think is important, the changes we make in ourselves with Aikido (for men and women :) )...

[giriasis]

When I was a girl (8 years old) I took up Tae Kwon Do, because I wanted to learn how to defend myself. But I never used it in a fight, unless you consider the sibling rivalry with my brothers. But it did give me confidence and a high self-esteem so I could handle other problems in my life. I practice TKD for three years.

About a year and a half ago I start aikido at age 29. I choose it because it uses the strength of the attacke against them and that it does not depend on force agains force like I found in TKD, otherwise I would have gone back to TKD.

I haven't had to use it in physical confrontation but I do use it help me with dealing with stress (I'm in law school) and keeping myself inshape and motivated.

But I think the one think martial arts does for women in general is that it gives us a certain confidence that elimanates us being and "easy target." For me self-defense is about prevention as well so aikido has taught me awareness and confidence that I might not be able to handle with out it. I am learning which techniques will work against big strong guys quickly becaues I train with them on a mat, and I am learning to control the gumby folks as well.

Right now, I am fairly confident that I could protect myself against most attackers. But my biggest challenge until that very rare circumstance is myself.

Good luck,
Anne Marie

[Mich]

I have a parttime job where I work with intellectally disabled people with "challenging behaviours". Anyway, there's this one guy there who is about 6ft 2 who regularly assaults staff and wil "go off" without warning at any time. Usually I manage to avoid any situations with this guy, but I have been attacked by him twice in the last 5 years. The first time was before I took up aikido and I wound up with a neck injury, bruises, bites, missing hair etc, and needed nearly a month off work and a couple of months of physio.
A few months ago I was standing talking to a staff member and this guy came up beside me and threw a punch at me with no warning. I instinctively put a sankyo on him and carried on talking to my co-worker. Her jaw just dropped, and it was only then that I realised what I'd done.
This instinctive reaction has given me back alot of confidence - I used to be a person who'd wake up frozen with fear in the middle of the night if the house creaked. Now that I know that I am capable of reacting instinctively (not to mention effectively).
:eek:

[Dajo251]

I am not a women but i have a good story about a good friend of mine who I was with. She is a 1st kyu and really really good. Well we were walking down the street in a fairly bad part of town when this big guy(about 6'6 300 + pounds she is 5'4 100 pounds) came up and tried to grab her purse. If it was anyone but this girl I would have stepped in but she immediatly put the guy in to Nikkyo and droped him all I could do was laugh at him.
Dan

[Spudza100]

I was just reading your post...one of my female friends did have to use at school..she was getting bullied by this guy.. But anyway she got him down and he never bothered after that..
ross
ps i do aikido too...well try to

[dainippon99]

one of the women in my dojo is also the wife of my sensei and is an ikkyu. On many occasions my sensei has regailed us with stories of her coming up behind him when he was on the couch, starting to cuddle and get all sweet on him, and next thing he knew he was in a chokehold. She is pretty cool.

[guest37503]

*LOL*
These are great!
About the last post, my boyfriend and I like to do that too...we'll be walking in the dark somewhere or something and he'll be messing around and he'll test my Aikido. I'm getting better. Most of the time when he tries to grab me or whatever I get out of it. It's pretty funny, the difference you feel when you're "messing around" with an Aikidoka and a non-Aikido person.
I'm always trying to make my Aikido real, so it's nice to have my boyfriend around to test me. It gives the Aikido a different element to work with that you might not get in the dojo. Usually people in the dojo are use to taking falls and will do it easily. Or they will take a pin and not squirm around too much.
Anyways, thank you to everyone posting!
Take care,
~Cecile

[PeterR]

Originally posted by Cecile Schaefer
*LOL*
These are great!
About the last post, my boyfriend and I like to do that too...we'll be walking in the dark somewhere or something and he'll be messing around and he'll test my Aikido. I'm getting better. Most of the time when he tries to grab me or whatever I get out of it. It's pretty funny, the difference you feel when you're "messing around" with an Aikidoka and a non-Aikido person.
I'm always trying to make my Aikido real, so it's nice to have my boyfriend around to test me. It gives the Aikido a different element to work with that you might not get in the dojo. Usually people in the dojo are use to taking falls and will do it easily. Or they will take a pin and not squirm around too much.
Anyways, thank you to everyone posting!
Take care,
~Cecile

It's fun no question there but please remember its not a true test. He does not want to hurt you and will stop when you tell him. Just like the dojo - but different.

[guest37503]

Of course. Of course neither will be anything like a REAL attack with intent. And I don't pretend it is. It's just training your body.

[Kevin]

Konbanwa!

I really love Aikido stories. Better yet, any story about any martial art. Maybe someone should write a book about a composition of aikido stories. Better yet, there should be a section on a website totally dedicated to stories! I am definetly volunteering my site to donate space.

Kevin
www.aikidouniverse.com

[guest37503]

Hey Kevin!
I've thoughts about that, too. (Making a book or website where people can contribute or just read Aikido stories.)
I tried to go to your site but it was down. Do you know when it will be up?
Take care,
~Cecile

[guest37503]

Whoops! Nevermind, it's working now.. ;)

[andrew]

Originally posted by Mich
I have a parttime job where I work with intellectally disabled people with "challenging behaviours".

A friend of mine worked in a mental hospital where most of the patients were capable of losing it. He didn't do Aikido, but they taught him ways to take them down, and his favorite was basically ikkyo.
andrew

[Axiom]

I'm not a woman, and I've not been in any real conflicts, but here are a couple of stories:

THe first thing I used to do after coming home from the dojo would be to say to my little brother(he's 13, I'm 17), "Guess what I learned tonight!" And while half the time he would scamper away, remembering when I taught him sankyo, the other half of the time he would gladly allow me to show him the technique and how to do it. Well, anyway, we also would play fight on the trampoline, not really using any formal martial techniques or anything, but occasionally throwing in a wrist lock(note: nagewaza are amazingly difficult to pull off on a trampoline). Well, one day he shocked the hell out of me when he put me into a perfect nikkyo- I was so amazingly helpless. All I could do was sort of flop around and tap as much as possible. I learned a lesson from that that I don't think I would have learned in the dojo about how strong a technique nikkyo really is.

The other incident I've had where aikido worked almost eerily well was when a friend of mine(he's 6'2" and probably 300 or so pounds)was just pushing me around in the halls. Well, since I'm only about 140 pounds and about 6' tall, I couldn't really push him back. So, I tried to use the aikido technique of getting out of the way, and instinctively I grabbed his arm as I tenshined...he went down so amazingly fast we were both shocked. He went sprawling, and I just stood there, astounded that all those months of aikido had suddenly become instinctive- and effective. Luckily, he wasn't hurt, and so I helped him up and we kept walking- he thought it was pretty damn cool.

Anyway, I'm out of good stories. Oh, and the moral of the first one is "Don't teach your little brother anything". It always ends in pain;-)

Alex Magidow

[Liz Baron]

Allied but off topic...

I've been doing aikido for a whole three months now (!) and am therefore still at the stage where my left and right hands aren't on speaking terms, and as for my footwork...well, enough said.

Imagine my surprise then last Friday leaving work: I'm walking towards a door, and through the glass panel in it I can see a chap approaching from the other side. (The door opens towards me, hinges on the left, handle on the right). I get there slightly ahead of him and without even thinking about it, much less doing it deliberately, I open the door for us both at exactly the point where he's committed himself to pushing it open for me...

We are so harmonised that he is running down the corridor after his leading hand... and I go off to the Dojo with a grin, realising that I now have everything perfect, as long as I can get my Sensei to allow me to hide behind a door!

Liz

[Niadh]

Originally posted by Kevin
Konbanwa!

I really love Aikido stories. Better yet, any story about any martial art. Maybe someone should write a book about a composition of aikido stories. Better yet, there should be a section on a website totally dedicated to stories! I am definetly volunteering my site to donate space.

Kevin
www.aikidouniverse.com

Kevin,
There is
http://www.aikidofaq.com/
have fun

[tarik]

Originally posted by Cecile Schaefer
If any woman wants to respond, black belt or not, I would be very interested.

Thanx for reading!
~Cecile


Ask Jen Smith who teaches the 8-12 year old class at North Bay. She has at least one good story for you. Also ask Linda Holiday Sensei sometime. She also has a few.

I'd relate some, but the stories are theirs. My own personal experiences seem to be more about being calmer and more relaxed in tense, scary, or difficult situations, and therefor being able to make better decisions. Some of those include physical confrontations, but most were psychological and/or emotional confrontations.

Regards,

Tarik

[Brian H]

Two female cops I work with were locking up a cranky drunk last month, who was less than fully cooperative. Both Officer decided that this gentleman NEEDED to be taken to the ground for handcuffing. (Try handcuffing someone who doesn't want to be cuffed standing sometime). One of the Officers had a little MA training and both had basic police Defensive Tactics training (heavily influenced by Aikido). For whatever reason both Officers independantly stepped up to Mr. Unhappy-Camper and did an "Arm bar take down" (A brute force version of Ikkyo) on opposite arms at the same time. The techique worked effortlessly and the Bad man went down with a thump. I understand his attitude improved quite abit after that.

[pottertw]

Originally posted by Cecile Schaefer
I think most of the time women take Aikido for different reasons than men. (if you're a woman reading this, I don't need to explain.)
I wanted to know, have you ever been attacked and been able to defend yourself? I have read Women in Aikido, but I want to know if there are any non-black belts who have been able to fend off someone.

If any woman wants to respond, black belt or not, I would be very interested.

Thanx for reading!
~Cecile


I love Aikido and think it's great, but most of my tough guy friends talk about the martial artist that they saw get taken down by somebody who could box. Isn't there someone out there with a story about how Aikido DIDN'T work and they got robbed, hurt, etc? Surely that's happened...

[guest1234]

oh yes, many stories of Aikido not working and getting the stuffing beat out of me :)
seriously, i think there are advantages and disadvantages in every MA and things like boxing...perhaps most are easier to perfect more quickly than Aikido, so a good boxer definately has an advantage over a poor Aikidoka. The better Aikidoka of course would be avoiding the situations that get you into comparing the relative effectiveness of different MAs.
My father boxed in prep school, and told a funny story about going up against a friend in the gym who was taking fencing instead (much prefering having a weapon in his hands). My father quickly charged his friend, took away the foil and chased his friend through the gym and up the dorm stairs with the stolen weapon. Perhaps showing that boxing may appeal to those more willing to risk personal injury to start with, and so in a better position to enter without fear and take control of a situation. i think this fearless entering comes less naturally to Aikidoka, although eventually.

[samurai_x]

Good Morning from this side of the globe,
Asia.I'll share u a story from one of my students on how effective AIKIDO is in actual situations.
Been teaching womens class for a while now.
Here's one true to life encounter.Sad to say our place is rampant w/ snatchings and robberies.
A lady student a 4th kyu was waiting for a ride when suddenly a guy from behind tried to snatch her bag but instinctively turned around at the moment she felt that somebody was grabbing her bag and just went w/ the flow and applied a kotegaishi w/c was very effectively done.
The guy went flying to the ground.

So the next time u train try to train w/ ur
heart and soul . U'll never know when and where a dangerous or a life threatening situation comes around. And ur knowledge in any MA always come n handy.Once it is in ur system anywhere u go, anytime of the day that knowledge is always w/ u .

TUOCS
MusubiDojo
Ki Aikido

[Chocolateuke]

this situation was not life threatning at all... but my leg iched like all the poison oak lived on my legs. I had poison oak and had some natural spray to stop the iching for a wile. this guy who was about 2 times as big as me took the bottle away. at first I said it has my poison oak oil on the bottle but he said that he does not get poison oak. then I said ok but I want it back i am icing man. he still did not give it back. then I said please!!! he still played with the bottle. so I waited for the moment when eh was not looking and applied a kote gashi and he went to the ground. then I just kept twisting and asking for the bottle. he gave it back and I was happy and my PE teacher had a grin on her face so... but he never picks on me anymore so...

Oh I didn not hurt him thx god.