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Ulises Garcia
06-06-2005, 11:23 AM
Hello again guys!

Have you noticed how (for some reason) your wardrobe is now made up of white shirts and baggy black pants, or that for some reason you start tapping out when going to the dentist? Maybe you have done Aikido for too long, so here's another idea for a Top 10 List:

Top 10 Signs You Have Done Way Too Much Aikido.

10.- Your idea for a perfect date involves candlelit dinner, romantic music and a helluva lot of randori.

9.- You unconsciously keep applying the kotegaeshi to people giving you a friendly handshake.

8.- Clapping twice not only turns the lights off. It also puts you in SEIZA.

Ok gang, keep'em coming! :D

U.

RebeccaM
06-06-2005, 12:22 PM
You bow entering your home or workplace...

Come on, I can't be the only one who's done this.

GLWeeks
06-06-2005, 01:20 PM
While holding hands with your loved one you keep thinking "Man, I could really mess them up.."

Sharon Seymour
06-06-2005, 01:28 PM
Even when you're out of socks and underwear, your first load of laundry is your uniforms ...
(and yes, I've bowed in the doorway of my house and friends' houses. Sigh)

MaryKaye
06-06-2005, 03:55 PM
Every grassy lawn or plush carpet looks like a place to practice your forward rolls.

You get asked to play a zombie in improv theater, and you screw it up because you can't convince yourself that it's okay to be "weight upperside" in your shoulders. (Aiki-zombie, that's me. It looked...wrong.)

You reflexively tie the sash of your fancy party dress into an obi knot.

When you travel for business, you look up the local dojo before you look up the shuttle bus or hotel listings.

Mary Kaye

Jeanne Shepard
06-06-2005, 08:13 PM
You bow entering your home or workplace...

Come on, I can't be the only one who's done this.

You bow when getting off the dance floor and get irritated with your partner for not doing the same to show respect. :p

Jeanne

Larry John
06-06-2005, 09:39 PM
You berate the PTO at your child's school to get the principal to change the school calendar so you can make just one more seminar next year.

Larry John
06-06-2005, 09:41 PM
You just know a trip for the two of you to Aikido Summer Camp would make the perfect anniversary present.

Larry John
06-06-2005, 09:42 PM
You say "Hai, Sensei!" to your client in the middle of a business meeting.

Larry John
06-06-2005, 09:44 PM
You're a professional business consultant with more keiko gis than business suits.

Larry John
06-06-2005, 09:45 PM
You'd rather have a new bokken than a new Xbox and your kid would rather do aikido class than play video games.

Larry John
06-06-2005, 10:08 PM
You obsessively study the Lone Wolf and Cub movies to get ideas about good footwork.

Larry John
06-06-2005, 10:10 PM
Your wife's favorite shirt has a picture of Musashi holding a severed head ... wait, my wife has one of those!

CNYMike
06-06-2005, 10:55 PM
You're in the middle of practicing an armlock in Kali that has the same body motion as ikkyo ura, and your body goes on autopilot and you watch yourself finish the pin and make guro tape out. (Actually happened a few weeks back. Guro Andy may have thought I was showing off, but I wasn't; darndest thing I ever felt, too!)

You instinctively blend with a falling coat hangar, keeping your arm a milimeter ahead of it as it falls, and you redirect it to the top of the washing machine where it rattles off your arm. You spend the next five minutes there standing there, thinking, "What the heck did I just do!?"

CNYMike
06-06-2005, 10:57 PM
.... your kid would rather do aikido class than play video games.

That is sick, sick, SICK! How's he supposed to join our sedintery society and be non-productive heart attack victim if he does that? Child abuse!

:D

CNYMike
06-06-2005, 11:00 PM
Although you aren't so far gone you bow when you get home, when you go to the gym to work out on your own, you have to fight the urge to bow to the aerobis are you use for practicing kata.

stuartjvnorton
06-06-2005, 11:21 PM
I think most YoshiOrcs have OSU!'d the 7-11 guy before.


I also thought most people's idea of a good date included an inpromptu newaza class afterwards... ;-)

Hrvoje
06-06-2005, 11:46 PM
You feel naked when you're not wearing a hakama:P

bleepbeep
06-07-2005, 12:17 AM
You get sick because you have not had practice.

You can pack your keiko gi and hakama faster than you can pack a weekend's supply of clothes.

You sleep with your bokken beside you, or anywhere near your reach.

bleepbeep
06-07-2005, 12:23 AM
You watch the new Star Wars movie a couple of times so you can keep track of the sword work, then you pay attention to the story. mwahahahahaha

Ulises Garcia
06-07-2005, 12:51 AM
You watch the new Star Wars movie a couple of times so you can keep track of the sword work, then you pay attention to the story. mwahahahahaha

You think that Anakin would've saved himself if he had done Shomenuchi Iriminage on Obi-Wan when he had the opening. :D

bbleeker
06-07-2005, 05:01 AM
Have you noticed how (for some reason) your wardrobe is now made up of white shirts and baggy black pants, or that for some reason you start tapping out when going to the dentist?

Yes, I've done that! Not at the dentist's, but at the doctor's. :)

Chuck.Gordon
06-07-2005, 05:30 AM
A classic:

http://www.aikidofaq.com/humor/top10/

The top 10 reasons Aikido training is like S&M

10. You go to a special place, get dressed in special clothes and tell someone how to hurt you

9. You pay to have it done to you

8. The more you do it. The harder and faster you want it.

7. Practitioners of both arts stay up all night looking for their stuff on the internet.

6. It can take your relationship to a new level if you can get you spouse involved.

5. You always say "Thank You" to the person hurting you when they are done.

4. Even if someone gets really hurt, chances are they'll do it again.

3. "The more you relax, the less this will hurt!"

2. No one understands why you do it except other people involved in the activity.

1. You inflict pain in an effort to get your partner horizontal. And then it's your turn. And you're glad!

RebeccaM
06-07-2005, 10:34 AM
You take ukemi for cars. I did this a couple months ago. I was coming through the intersection on my bicycle when someone decided that now was the time to take their free right. I felt/heard/saw the car coming at me, so I turned in the direction the car was going and rode alongside it until it had completed their turn and then I scurried back into the bike lane where I belonged. I also shouted and cursed, which wasn't very aiki but seemed appropriate at the time.

Eric Webber
06-07-2005, 10:46 AM
You find yourself driving with "Ki Grip"

You practice rowing exercise while using vacuum cleaner.

Sweeping the front/back porch with a broom has significant martial implications for any bystanders.

You focus on hanmi while cleaning the toilet bowl.

You keep a bokken at work for slow periods in the day (several us at the dojo are guilty of this one)

Tim Gerrard
06-07-2005, 11:25 AM
You open doors by extending through the edge of your hand, and moving from your centre.

You wonder why the rest of the office stares at you after seeing you do this.
Or maybe that's just me :disgust:

Jeremy Young
06-07-2005, 11:49 AM
OMG!!! this is me! jajajajaja....now i do not feel so crazy! or at least i feel better knowing that others in the world are just as crazy as me. Last weekend i performed the wedding ceremony for a friend of mine and afterwards at the reception while the music was playing and people were dancing...me and my girlfriend were off to the side...her punching me and me explaining the different enters into kote gaeshi! does that count?

Tim Gerrard
06-07-2005, 12:10 PM
her punching me and me explaining the different enters into kote gaeshi! does that count?

Depends on whether you used the phrase "but if you were to do this..." to highlight a variation.

Matt Molloy
06-07-2005, 12:33 PM
I also shouted and cursed, which wasn't very aiki but seemed appropriate at the time.

*Ahem*

It's called Kiai.

Cheers,

Matt.

AaronFrancher
06-07-2005, 09:49 PM
You sleep with your bokken beside you, or anywhere near your reach.

This is true...and somewhat unnerving to family members...

When watching action films, you critique their fighting form. (this also unnerves family members)

bleepbeep
06-07-2005, 10:54 PM
You practice your footwork and evasion when in a crowd. And people look at you funny.

ad_adrian
06-08-2005, 01:17 AM
i have a habbit of bowing and saying osu to everyone :O and thats serious

stuartjvnorton
06-08-2005, 02:50 AM
I would have thought it not possible.
Maybe you could change the thread to "top 10 signs you haven't done enough Aiki" ;-)

Oh, and stick a "Not" in front of the posts...

Lorien Lowe
06-08-2005, 01:46 PM
You bow when you enter or leave the bathroom (thankfully, not anymore).

You bow whenever you thank someone (not very often anymore...)

you catch yourself doing any of the above before you start it and stop yourself just in time to avoid scaring anyone.

malsmith
06-08-2005, 01:56 PM
it was pretty funny cause this year in my high school there was a korean exchange student there (who was really cool!), and he did actually bow to people when he said thanks and he bowed sometimes when he entered a room and a teacher was there... and then i kinda started doing it too without really thinking about it, but everyone just thought i was crazy cause i wasnt korean!

malsmith
06-08-2005, 02:07 PM
You'd rather have a new bokken than a new Xbox and your kid would rather do aikido class than play video games.

now that would make the world a better place! :)
(no, i think we should all have a perfect balance in our lives between video games and aikido)

Jeanne Shepard
06-08-2005, 07:44 PM
You open doors by extending through the edge of your hand, and moving from your centre.

You wonder why the rest of the office stares at you after seeing you do this.
Or maybe that's just me :disgust:

I do that on purpose, and I don't care who stares!

Jeanne :p

DustinAcuff
06-08-2005, 11:33 PM
Here's a few more....

You drive your car by "guiding" and "redirecting" your car's momentum.

You would rather say home and train than go on a vacation to Disney.

You have ever tried shadow Aikido in a mirror to see if you can get off your own line faster than you can attack. (I was bored)

You can tell how old a Seagal movie is by a) how many techniques he uses or b) which uke's he is using.

The faster something comes at you the slower time moves.

You sometimes wonder if you could ukemi over a car if suprised.

Anything you touch over 1 foot long becomes a bokken in your hands!

It is impossible for you to be involved in a tug-of-war match anymore.

You dream of one day being attacked by a Judoka.

You rely on your fellow students to be your full time chiropractors (Kote gaeshi, Tenchi nage, Kaiten nage).

Ulises Garcia
06-09-2005, 01:52 AM
You consider the "20 year technique" to be a thing for beginners... :freaky:

maikerus
06-09-2005, 01:55 AM
You can recite your Aikido Lineage, but can't remember your own phone number :freaky:

Ulises Garcia
06-09-2005, 02:02 AM
now that would make the world a better place! :)
(no, i think we should all have a perfect balance in our lives between video games and aikido)

Nicely put Mal! After a nice (and peaceful) class slamming away, it's time to blast those d@mn*d Invid, muahahahahahahaha! evileyes

Cheers,

:)

Karen Wolek
06-09-2005, 12:33 PM
While helping out in your child's first grade classroom, the teacher gives you direction.....and you catch yourself right before you almost say, "Yes, Sensei."

And yes, once I also caught myself right before I almost bowed when leaving the classroom.

ElizabethCastor
06-10-2005, 05:06 PM
You actually see a beautiful tenkan in a basketball move...

When walking/jogging in the park you figure how to take down any approaching person.... AND their dogs!

Make the hand motions (smallish but still noticable) to accomplish said take-downs. It gets people a little nervous :blush:

Lorien Lowe
06-11-2005, 05:05 PM
You would rather say home and train than go on a vacation to Disney.

You decide not to transfer to another university because you don't want to leave your dojo.

bleepbeep
06-11-2005, 09:15 PM
You actually see a beautiful tenkan in a basketball move...


:)

Oh my goodness, and i see the beautiful tenkans in the football games too!!! :)

Eric Webber
06-13-2005, 10:42 AM
The first thing you want to do after seeing a fun movie (e.g."Mr. and Mrs. Smith") is go to the dojo and train...even at 11pm on a Sunday night.

DustinAcuff
06-14-2005, 05:10 PM
LOL Lorien! You are sooo right...that was the major factor in me not wanting to transfer!

RebeccaM
06-14-2005, 06:21 PM
The availability of a good dojo was a major factor in my choice of grad schools.

Just don't tell my boss...

Tubig
06-14-2005, 08:42 PM
You say 'Haiii' to everyone. Even Indians, Anglos, and italians. Funny enough they know what youre talking about.

Lorien Lowe
06-15-2005, 02:55 PM
You say, 'hai!' to the doctor in the middle of a code in the emergency room ...

Josh Bisker
06-15-2005, 03:29 PM
You fear for the day when, dancing at a friend's wedding you become so relaxed that, losing yourself in the rhythm of your partner's hips moving with yours to the music, you step through into an effortless koshinage, killing any chances you had with beautiful woman you were dancing with as well as, unsurprisingly, nearly killing the woman herself.

giriasis
06-15-2005, 03:48 PM
when your so ukemi deprived while surfing the channels on t.v. that you stop and watch some WWE just to see them take breakfalls. :p :|

DustinAcuff
06-15-2005, 11:47 PM
John, I feel your pain! I was dancing with a girl once and the particular dance reminded me way to much of the Muai Thai I was doing at the time.....I JUST caught myself before going for a clench+knee+elbow combo....very scary, especially since I was still in public schools at the time.

Jeanne Shepard
06-16-2005, 12:00 AM
You only take Aikido vacations (pathetic!)

Jeanne

Simbo
06-16-2005, 01:22 AM
You decide not to transfer to another university because you don't want to leave your dojo.

I recently had to deal with this one. But since both schools had Aikido clubs, I was trying to think of a way I could train at both, one while at school, and one when I was back at home visiting.

ian
06-16-2005, 04:13 AM
- you accidently leave a picture of a wisened old man at people's houses
- you 'blend' with the traffic when there is a near accident on the road
- you stand at the entrance to a door hoping everyone else will go through first
- you stand between you and your pets food, trying to get irimi-nage on it whilst it rushes forward.
- when you've missed a few sessions you end up grabbing your own forearms tightly, just to remember how it feels
- you look at people's posture as they walk along and try to refrain from saying 'relax your shoulders'

Ed Stansfield
06-16-2005, 07:47 AM
- When learning a dance for your wedding, instead of moving around your partner with a graceful 1-2-3-4 timing, you execute a determined ushiro-tekubi-tori catch.

Dance teacher: "NOT like that!"

(proof that Aikido is not like dancing?)

Best,

Ed

ChristianBoddum
06-16-2005, 08:09 AM
You seriously consider going into politics to better your dojo's
situation ! :crazy:

Tim Gerrard
06-16-2005, 09:40 AM
Has anyone else tried Nikkyo on themselves when bored?

:disgust:

CNYMike
06-16-2005, 11:18 AM
Has anyone else tried Nikkyo on themselves when bored?

:disgust:

No, but I kept doing the aiki-taiso wrist stretches related to nikkyo, sankyo, and kote gaeshi as part of my own workout during the years I wasn't doing Aikido. First night back, now-Sempai Ian noted my flexible wrists. I didn't have the heart to tell him; feel like a bit of a fraud for not mentioning it.

Goye
06-16-2005, 02:39 PM
- In your office computer you have more Mbytes of Aikido documents, photos, and videos than work documents.
- While dancing you imagine how good would be to do a koshinage to your partner
- In the crowd streets you walk doing Irimi and Tenkan
- In your home and office computers and in your cellular phone there is a wallpaper with the portrait of Osensei or other Aikido Pic.
- You have applied several times kotegaeshi to your girlfriend and little brothers.
- You dream about travelling all around the world and doing Aikido in all places
- Your students have some of your old gis or belts
- You know most of the martial artist in your city

And I`m also one of those, I can`t say thanks with out bowing. And also after dancing. And also if I enter late to class to a meeting,.. and when I get home

Holly Nesbeitt
06-16-2005, 08:35 PM
You cringe when the pianist bows at the end of the concert. Don't just flop over like that! Bend from the hips, hands at your sides!

bleepbeep
06-16-2005, 11:21 PM
your notebooks meant for class notes are half filled with doodles of stick figures ( with hakamas) doing the techniques frame by frame/thumbnail sketches of the movements from attack to the finishing throw or pin. ;)

Sue Trinidad
06-16-2005, 11:30 PM
You bow when getting off the dance floor and get irritated with your partner for not doing the same to show respect. :p

Jeanne

Better yet, do this in a learn-to-salsa-dance class, where you don't know the people other than your spouse! They all think I'm nuts, though I admit the mishmash of Latin music and Japanese bowing is pretty funny. . . ;)

Sue

CNYMike
06-17-2005, 12:34 AM
When your Kali instructor cancels a Tuesday night class because his kids are sick, the first thought that pops into your mind is you can sit in at a college Aikido club. (And the only reason you sit in is because of a sore neck.)

SMART2o
06-24-2005, 04:28 PM
A classic:

http://www.aikidofaq.com/humor/top10/

The top 10 reasons Aikido training is like S&M

10. You go to a special place, get dressed in special clothes and tell someone how to hurt you

9. You pay to have it done to you

8. The more you do it. The harder and faster you want it.

7. Practitioners of both arts stay up all night looking for their stuff on the internet.

6. It can take your relationship to a new level if you can get you spouse involved.

5. You always say "Thank You" to the person hurting you when they are done.

4. Even if someone gets really hurt, chances are they'll do it again.

3. "The more you relax, the less this will hurt!"

2. No one understands why you do it except other people involved in the activity.

1. You inflict pain in an effort to get your partner horizontal. And then it's your turn. And you're glad!


BRILLIANT!

souji
06-28-2005, 11:20 PM
I almost fell off my chair when I read the "The top 10 reasons Aikido training is like S&M". Keep the funnies coming ladies and gents =)

Karen King
06-29-2005, 09:21 AM
You occasionally have dreams where your sensei or shihan is telling you something cryptic/important and you spend the next week trying to figure out what it meant.

Someone approaches too close to you in a parking lot and you tenkan to increase your ma ai and only realize thats what you were doing after you did it.

One of the reasons you change careers was that the old one was too inconvenient for doing Aikido.

One of your main concerns about getting older is that you won't be able to take as much ukemi.

CNYMike
06-29-2005, 11:27 AM
Even though there is probaly another copy of it in your house somewhere, you pick up a copy of "Principles of Aikido" by Saotme Sensei on impulse during your road trip.

You use "_______ Sensei" without thinking about it.

jss
06-29-2005, 12:10 PM
You're bored and holding a pen,
so you take it between thumbs and index fingers
and start doing a jo-kata.

Lorien Lowe
06-29-2005, 01:47 PM
One of your main concerns about getting older is that you won't be able to take as much ukemi.

this terrifies me. I love ukemi.

sunny liberti
06-29-2005, 03:37 PM
The first thing you want to do after seeing a fun movie (e.g."Mr. and Mrs. Smith") is go to the dojo and train...even at 11pm on a Sunday night.
Well, once my husband went directly to morning class from the airport after we arrived from Japan. We had been travelling about 24 hours and he had watched The Matrix about 13 times in a row on the plane. He wanted to try some stuff out, ya know. I think he just about leveled someone doing nikkyo, by planting his free hand and kicking nage with both feet. It was just imbedded in his head from the movie.

Another is that he actually did a knife take away at our wedding reception while cutting the cake. I took ukemi and all. The relatives try to hide whose pictures in the album!!

Niamh Marie O'Leary-Liu
06-29-2005, 08:49 PM
- You exit your car and shut the door in one smooth tenkan.



:p

bbleeker
06-30-2005, 06:37 AM
[My husband] actually did a knife take away at our wedding reception while cutting the cake. I took ukemi and all. The relatives try to hide those pictures in the album!!

Do they? WE want to see them! Could you scan them and put them in the image gallery? Please?

daniel loughlin
06-30-2005, 01:54 PM
at the wedding the aikidokas in the audience made minature hakamas from the serviettes

daniel loughlin
06-30-2005, 02:08 PM
The first thing you want to do after seeing a fun movie (e.g."Mr. and Mrs. Smith") is go to the dojo and train...even at 11pm on a Sunday night.
this happend to me after seing the new batman film :D but got out of the cinema at 23:30

samurai_kenshin
06-30-2005, 11:29 PM
while talking to sensei on the phone you constantly bow to the phone.
and sadly, yes, I have bowed outside the dojo, but it was to my japanese science teacher. She bowed back and told me she used to do Aikido in her younger days (i was happy afterward)

maynard
07-06-2005, 11:34 AM
Sunny Liberti wrote:
[My husband] actually did a knife take away at our wedding reception while cutting the cake. I took ukemi and all. The relatives try to hide those pictures in the album!!



Do they? WE want to see them! Could you scan them and put them in the image gallery? Please?

All though, I'm not the one who posted above, I ended my first dance with my wife at our wedding with a koshinage, check it out:

http://dns.underwatersamurai.com/wedding/color-web/slides/0071004-R6-064-30A.html

She kind of rolled off of my hip, so she didn't take a full breakfall, everyone was a bit surprised.

John

CNYMike
07-07-2005, 12:03 PM
.... I ended my first dance with my wife at our wedding with a koshinage, check it out:

http://dns.underwatersamurai.com/wedding/color-web/slides/0071004-R6-064-30A.html

She kind of rolled off of my hip, so she didn't take a full breakfall, everyone was a bit surprised.

John

And you didn't let go of her, right? :D

Dunadan
07-07-2005, 07:45 PM
- You exit your car and shut the door in one smooth tenkan.



:p

Yup, done that one, and the "bowing gassho thank-you" out of habit. :o

Jeanne Shepard
07-07-2005, 08:28 PM
Sunny Liberti wrote:
[My husband] actually did a knife take away at our wedding reception while cutting the cake. I took ukemi and all. The relatives try to hide those pictures in the album!!



Do they? WE want to see them! Could you scan them and put them in the image gallery? Please?

All though, I'm not the one who posted above, I ended my first dance with my wife at our wedding with a koshinage, check it out:

http://dns.underwatersamurai.com/wedding/color-web/slides/0071004-R6-064-30A.html

She kind of rolled off of my hip, so she didn't take a full breakfall, everyone was a bit surprised.

John

That is soooo funny!


Jeanne

(where'd my avatar go?, Janet, did you steal it?!)

Clarke
07-08-2005, 04:31 AM
you do outside-inside wrist spirals while walking places and people think your waving to them(happend more than once to me)

bbleeker
07-08-2005, 10:17 AM
I ended my first dance with my wife at our wedding with a koshinage, check it out:

http://dns.underwatersamurai.com/wedding/color-web/slides/0071004-R6-064-30A.html


GREAT picture! :-)

Aragorn
07-09-2005, 09:17 AM
You must Stand in hamni. Standing otherwise is annoying.

Zach Sarver
07-10-2005, 09:21 PM
A classic:

http://www.aikidofaq.com/humor/top10/

The top 10 reasons Aikido training is like S&M

10. You go to a special place, get dressed in special clothes and tell someone how to hurt you

9. You pay to have it done to you

8. The more you do it. The harder and faster you want it.

7. Practitioners of both arts stay up all night looking for their stuff on the internet.

6. It can take your relationship to a new level if you can get you spouse involved.

5. You always say "Thank You" to the person hurting you when they are done.

4. Even if someone gets really hurt, chances are they'll do it again.

3. "The more you relax, the less this will hurt!"

2. No one understands why you do it except other people involved in the activity.

1. You inflict pain in an effort to get your partner horizontal. And then it's your turn. And you're glad!


Hey that is from my Dojo's website!!!

Tim Heckman
07-10-2005, 10:09 PM
You can't go to action movies without hearing your sensei's voice:

1) In Star Wars, where Anakin is crawling away from the lake, and I'm hearing her say "That's not compassionate, that's just cruel." She's got a habit of demonstrating how incomplete or insincere attacks lack compassion.

2) Batman Begins, "Why do we fall Master Bruce? So we can get up again."

3) And in a dojo moment , where she jokingly says she'll have to kill me, and I say "Well, I know how I'm going to die then." She had just seen Big Fish, so we were both happy about that one.

Jory Boling
07-10-2005, 10:19 PM
you do outside-inside wrist spirals while walking places and people think your waving to them(happend more than once to me)

i was at the market today practicing extension with one arm and with my fingers spread when my wife called to me, "jory-san!" (she's japanese) "hai!" i dutifully answered and some lady thought i was waving and calling to her...

samurai_kenshin
07-11-2005, 05:08 PM
You accidently throw your cousin when he tries to jump on your back and suprize you...yeah, I did that this morning...good thing we were on grass...

Amassus
07-12-2005, 06:26 PM
You start talking about your latest aikido revelation and your partner no longer finds it interesting like she did when you first met her. Now she just rolls her eyes. :confused:

Dirk Hanss
07-14-2005, 03:55 PM
No, I haven't done too much Aiki.
I even haven't done enough.
I left dojo two hours ago .... hmmmm
OK, let's go back to the mat, I have a key.

Yes, I know it is a little bit boring, rolling lonesome over tha mat at midnight.

But one needs practice, don't you?

Dirk ;) ;) ;) :D :D :D ;) ;) ;)

maeukemi
07-14-2005, 05:57 PM
You find yourself doing koho tento undo to
a) get out of bed
b) propel yourself off the floor
c) get out of a chair
d) any other time you can find an excuse

Sitting in seiza, while still uncomfortable, feels more comfortable than sitting "properly" in a chair.

You can't walk in a straight line anywhere. You find yourself doing irimi tenkan every chance you can beg, steal, or borrow.

You don't stand "straight" in a line, but in hanmi stance.

The first thing you want to know when attending your uncle's wedding cross-country is "Where's the dojo where I can get some practice?" even though you will only be out of town for a day and a half.

When you wake up in the morning you find you are doing 'kitty-nage'... otherwise known as cuddling your cat in a sankyo grip.

:)

Kerry Monument
07-14-2005, 07:16 PM
Instead of your usual dreams about a paradise filled with beautiful eye candy you start dreaming about aikido technique and meeting O'sensei.

Lorien Lowe
07-14-2005, 10:20 PM
You don't stand "straight" in a line, but in hanmi stance.


You find it scary to dance with a partner (especially someone you haven't trained with at the dojo) because you have to face them square-on, and who knows what kind of whacko they might be?

Dirk Hanss
07-15-2005, 03:47 AM
You find it scary to dance with a partner (especially someone you haven't trained with at the dojo) because you have to face them square-on, and who knows what kind of whacko they might be?

Again, you just haven't done enough. Otherwise you would have the right move for every action that might come.

OUT OF BED! ON THE MAT!!! YOU NEED PRACTICE !! :grr: evileyes

bbleeker
07-15-2005, 06:31 AM
Instead of your usual dreams about a paradise filled with beautiful eye candy you start dreaming about aikido technique and meeting O'sensei.

I actually did that! I once dreamt I was at a seminar taught by O Sensei.

beanchild
07-15-2005, 09:33 AM
...i wish i trained more...

rogueenergy
07-15-2005, 01:05 PM
I actually did that! I once dreamt I was at a seminar taught by O Sensei.

Did you learn anything? :D

Eric Webber
07-15-2005, 01:30 PM
You purchase shoes/sandels/boots/etc based on well you could perform technique in the street while wearing them. :rolleyes:

spinecracker
07-15-2005, 04:06 PM
You can't do housework without using the broom to run through the 31 jo kata - I was doing pretty good until I clunked myself with the head of the broom......

DustinAcuff
07-17-2005, 01:04 AM
You cant walk too far without having the urge to show off your ukemi skills, and secretly wish that one day you will trip and be able to roll out of it to the awe of everyone around you.

CNYMike
07-17-2005, 12:13 PM
Did you learn anything? :D

I would drop a brick if the answer was "Yes." :eek: :)

spinecracker
07-17-2005, 01:26 PM
but what actually happens is that you slip and fall on your butt, without an audience to appreciate your excellent skills at ukemi, and end up being taken to the hospital - been there, done that...... :P

shoshin42
07-18-2005, 10:36 AM
but what actually happens is that you slip and fall on your butt, without an audience to appreciate your excellent skills at ukemi, and end up being taken to the hospital - been there, done that...... :P

been there, done that also...
while delivering pizzas after being unwillingly out of my career field for a year, I slipped and fell on a steep icy driveway.

Did a nice breakfall and saved the pizzas!

of course, no one saw.

Back on topic...

holding hand's with your significant other and fighting to resist doing a kotegaeshi every time your hands swing forward.

maynard
07-18-2005, 11:04 AM
<snip>

Back on topic...

holding hand's with your significant other and fighting to resist doing a kotegaeshi every time your hands swing forward.
This is at least half the reason my wife started doing Aikido, I kept practicising with her instead of just holding her hand. I didn't actually ever throw her.

John

Eric Webber
07-18-2005, 02:52 PM
Taking the elevator from the fourth floor to the lobby, you think about which techniques you could realistically pull off in that amount of space, and if randori in that small of a space is possible. :confused:

CNYMike
07-19-2005, 11:16 AM
been there, done that also...
while delivering pizzas after being unwillingly out of my career field for a year, I slipped and fell on a steep icy driveway.

Did a nice breakfall and saved the pizzas!

of course, no one saw.



Back in January, I think, I brought my dog in from a walk down the back yard, and she yanked to go back to her box. The doormat -- which I had one foot on -- slid out from under me. It was a less than perfect ukemi -- my right knee folded in a way it shouldn't have -- but I instictively tucked my head, so the back of my neck didn't smack on the sliding door's track.

Hildie, of course, ran right over to me, and trying to get up when you have a concerned 60 pound dog on your chest can be a challenge. But I think she knows she screwed up because she hasn't done the same thing since.

samurai_kenshin
07-19-2005, 05:06 PM
Taking the elevator from the fourth floor to the lobby, you think about which techniques you could realistically pull off in that amount of space, and if randori in that small of a space is possible. :confused:
Oh, so I guess I'm not the only one! I actually tried it though. When I was at the hotel in Louisiana, the door opened on the third floor with my brother in nikkyo. The old woman whom the door opened in front of threatened to call the police, thinking I was trying to rob my brother! I quickly explained that I practiced Aikido and was only practicing on my brother. To show my sincerity I let my brother get me in sankyo. She looked at us strangely, then got on the elevator and left. She avoided us after that one...

LinSuHill
07-21-2005, 03:02 AM
You bow in and out of restaurants.

(So you only eat at Japanese restaurants nowdays...)

CNYMike
07-21-2005, 10:25 AM
When your dog gets "playful" as you try to put the leash on her (depending on how seriously she has to go), your fist blends with the movement of her head and you press into a point just at the corner of her jaw, immobilizing her in her box, and shout "DON'T MOVE!" (The blending part is th Aiki part.)

emma.mason15
07-21-2005, 03:23 PM
you have to fight the urge to inflict nikkyo on really horrible children and stuck up parents at the school gates

Tim Gerrard
07-22-2005, 02:30 AM
you have to fight the urge to inflict nikkyo on really horrible children and stuck up parents at the school gates

I have that feeling, but substitute in co-workers for parents

:disgust:

KerstineElnegaard
07-22-2005, 04:06 AM
You go to an aikido seminar with a very respected Japanese sensei, and at the evening party. At the party you are expected to eat with chopsticks, so they are laid out in front of you, and naturally you start doing kumi jo with the person next to you (from your own club)

You get to the third kumi jo before you (by a freak accident) push over a beer into the lap of a sempai... whhoooops :rolleyes: ...on the tatami mats... while people are eating...

Eric Webber
07-22-2005, 03:01 PM
you have to fight the urge to inflict nikkyo on really horrible children and stuck up parents at the school gates

...and in your office when they're running around like little maniacs :grr: ...though I have been known to do the leading begining of irimi nage to get a child's attention :p

emma.mason15
07-24-2005, 05:16 AM
...and in your office when they're running around like little maniacs :grr: ...though I have been known to do the leading begining of irimi nage to get a child's attention :p

orrr you wanna do it to the gits that vandalise the park .... and hang around on street corners intimadating old ladies and drinking nasty cheap cider ..... evileyes grrrr I hate them!
pointless mindless vandalism .... "ohhhh theres nothing to do ....." COME MEET SENSEI! lol :D

maeukemi
07-27-2005, 09:04 AM
You cant walk too far without having the urge to show off your ukemi skills, and secretly wish that one day you will trip and be able to roll out of it to the awe of everyone around you.


Not to brag -- okay, so my ego will probably get polishing for this one... but... I've actually done this... not random walking, but at the dojo during practice last week... our tatami mats are kinda older, so the edges tend to stick up and I tend to trip on them...(still new, ya know)... this time, i tripped and went into an immediate mae ukemi...
Keith-san: "Did you mean to do that?"
Me: "Not exactly. I stuck on the edge."
Sensei: "Well, it was a pretty good roll."

If I spend the next year struggling with everything else...I will always be thankful that aikido has, at least, trained this into me, so I can finally roll out of trips and falls. Now, if my body could just learn a similar technique that's acceptable to perform in a skirt so I can use it when I trip on carpet shag at the office...

bbleeker
07-27-2005, 10:07 AM
I would drop a brick if the answer was "Yes." :eek: :)

Maybe, but I'd forgotten it all by the time I woke up. ;)

Peter Gombeski
07-31-2005, 02:47 PM
You've actually tried to develop 'unbendable finger'

theflyingheadbuttsuplex
07-31-2005, 04:40 PM
you are playing capture the flag and you instictively to roll to escape over the line to your side!

I did this from a full sprint and it worked, but there was too much momentum, so I tripped as soon as I was standing :o

~RIYO~
08-01-2005, 06:53 PM
On my Queen size bed I do forward rolls and I land right on my feet!

Tenor_Jon
08-02-2005, 12:08 AM
Ok, here's a few of mine:
I'll add in the occasional bow for thanking or apologizing to someone.
Also doing footwork (irimi tenkan stuff, as well as fencing advance and retreat stepping) during work to avoid the crowd of people during tax free weekend.
You didn't get to the next level (sophmore level vocal performance) because you had a cold in which you completely lost your voice 5 hours After the jury (so it was a miracle that you had a voice that was semi decent), and because the voice faculty criticized you for leaning forward slightly (not sure if that was aikido to blame or just my personal habits, I think it was a bit of both) and for standing in hamni.
But I'm pretty sure I'll ace my juries this next fall when I take em again.
Umm...ok so mine aren't that funny, but oh well (Shrugs)

Newbie
08-02-2005, 05:51 AM
You replay techniques learnt the day before and sketch it out.
You train everyday and sometimes three times a day.
No injury can stop you from training.
Your hands are calloused from too much weapons training.

spinecracker
08-03-2005, 11:55 AM
you are playing capture the flag and you instictively to roll to escape over the line to your side!

I did this from a full sprint and it worked, but there was too much momentum, so I tripped as soon as I was standing :o

did the same thing during paintball - was running like crazy and did a forward roll into the tiny wooden fort they had, shots flying all around me (looked like something out of the Matrix!). Was so surprised with myself that I stood up to check for any hits - right into the line of fire......those paintballs hurt!

Tim Gerrard
08-04-2005, 05:38 PM
You're more bothered about turning up late for class than turning up late for work...wait was I ever bothered about work?...

:disgust:

Susan Marie
08-05-2005, 08:15 AM
You're in a sports equipment store buying running shoes.

You say, "HAI!" when the sales assistant, who happens to be Japanese, finishes telling you how important it is to buy the proper shoes for your feet.

Or...(this one happened to a guy I used to train with)
You're dating someone and in an intimate situation when you're partner tells you to change what you're doing. You say, "OSU!"

Camille Lore
08-10-2005, 10:44 AM
You slide forward though doors after people and turn your hips to see if you can get through the door before it closes without touching it.....
You ippon seio nage your towel off your shoulders in the morning.... :rolleyes:

DustinAcuff
08-11-2005, 12:41 AM
You start practicing your extreme ukemi skills by standing in the freeway at night and rolling over each car that hits you.

You start developing the cat-like ability to always land on your feet when thrown regaurdless of who or how.

Jiawei
08-11-2005, 01:46 AM
You start practicing your extreme ukemi skills by standing in the freeway at night and rolling over each car that hits you.

You start developing the cat-like ability to always land on your feet when thrown regaurdless of who or how.

You start trying to do irimi nages with each car that passes by or try to sneak a nikkyo lock on anybody and everybody who comes into contact with you ? :D

Camille Lore
10-17-2005, 12:14 PM
You pass by a sign that says "BBQ Chicken" and you swear you read BUDO chicken! :D

seph
10-21-2005, 07:55 PM
i walk around in circles waiting for my next class :D does that count?

Simbo
10-21-2005, 08:44 PM
you have to fight the urge to inflict nikkyo on really horrible children and stuck up parents at the school gates

I guess I don't do enough Aikido because I don't think nikkyo I usually have to surpress the urge to smack them. Does that mean I get to train more since I haven't done too much?

Joshua Livingston
10-21-2005, 11:56 PM
I will often say "Hai" to waiters in restaurants or cashiers at fast food places. It's especially funny when I go to Mexican restaurants where the waiters speak Spanish as their first language. They are probably thinking that they should know what I'm saying, but can't figure out why they don't. It helps though that I always nod my head yes as I'm saying it, so they at least have the body language.

Another one for me is whenever I visit a doctor and they ask me to take a deep breath... They then have to reiterate "Ok, not THAT deep." LOL.

Even though it happens nearly every time, I don't think about it I just start breathing in as I would during deep breathing exercises....

I'm also guilty of the following:

You bow entering your home or workplace...(only occasionally).

Every grassy lawn or plush carpet looks like a place to practice your forward rolls, (It's so tempting, though I feel the same way with big newly paved empty car parks.).

You sleep with your bokken beside you, or anywhere near your reach, (You never know when the invisible ninja will attack! ;) ).


You watch the new Star Wars movie a couple of times so you can keep track of the sword work, then you pay attention to the story. mwahahahahaha, (I use playback and slow motion as well, especially in scenes when I think the work is dodgy or when split sequences don't seem to line up: "Hey he wasn't in that stance!").

You practice rowing exercise while using vacuum cleaner, (Since our handle is a bit short, it's a lot better on my back as well).

You open doors by extending through the edge of your hand, and moving from your centre, (I constantly do this at public restrooms).

When watching action films, you critique their fighting form.

You practice your footwork and evasion when in a crowd. And people look at you funny, (I usually do so very subtly. So if people notice, I don't notice it.)

You sometimes wonder if you could ukemi over a car if surprised, (hopfully I'll never find out, I've also wondered if I could somehow manage to do a Tenkan in water out of a sharks path LOL).

You can recite your Aikido Lineage, but can't remember your own phone number

You decide not to transfer to another university because you don't want to leave your dojo


You only take Aikido vacations, (or want to make sure hit a Dojo during the vacation).

You dream about traveling all around the world and doing Aikido in all places. :)~~~

The first thing you want to know when attending your uncle's wedding cross-country is "Where's the dojo where I can get some practice?" even though you will only be out of town for a day and a half.

You purchase shoes/sandals/boots/etc based on well you could perform technique in the street while wearing them. (And shirts and pants...)

You slide forward though doors after people and turn your hips to see if you can get through the door before it closes without touching it..... (I use to do this in high school, but not so much anymore).

Livingston

merlynn
10-22-2005, 06:03 AM
you have to fight the urge to inflict nikkyo on really horrible children and stuck up parents at the school gates

mmmmmmmmmmm i know what you mean emma but i have to fight the urge to do nikkiyo on my sons headmistress cos shes evil

Lorien Lowe
10-23-2005, 12:55 AM
You can recite your Aikido Lineage, but can't remember your own phone number

Well, my aikido lineage only has three people to remember but my phone number has seven numbers!

And there are so many other numbers to get it mixed up with....

-LK

maeukemi
10-25-2005, 06:23 AM
When anyone comes within 3 feet of you, you reflexively step offline or tenkan out of the way.

When anyone's hands come anywhere in the general vicinity of your head, you either duck or try to grab their wrist.

You do a full tenkan going through any door.

You have to restrain yourself from performing a koshinage on your father as you two are dancing at your uncle's wedding, and manage only because you know he can't take ukemi.

At the end of the song he tells you "Hey, you're a better dancer than your mum!" :D

You (mistakenly) say "Grab my wrist!" to your youngest karateka cousin after he says "Show me something!" (He couldn't take ukemi.) :(

You find yourself wishing there was a way to sit in seiza and keep driving, because sitting with your legs stuck out like that is soooo uncomfortable....

ALine Filipe
10-25-2005, 12:37 PM
You practice your footwork and evasion when in a crowd. And people look at you funny.

Gosh i never said this to anyone but i actually do that. I thought i was the only one.!!

[QUOTE=Dustin Acuff]You would rather say home and train than go on a vacation to Disney.[\QUOTE]

AH! :dead: is it that bad??? :sorry: *ahem* i did it quite a few times....
I do also clap when i go to the doctor. And when i'm practicing for my practical exams. :drool:

Gosh... i've been thinking... i do most of the things you say... :rolleyes: hum... I bow when i thanks someone (not on purpose but when i try to undo it it's just too late); my university is next to my dojo ( :hypno: ) so i don't need to skip classes

ehehe....

Another one... you know you've been doing too much aiki if you keep saying domo arigatou (and sometimes even *** gozaimashita)... Gosh it has happened sometimes lately,...

Satyre
10-26-2005, 09:02 AM
Your wife threatens not to dance with you at your own wedding.

Corrolary: You now look forward to going to dancing lessons with her to see if the dancing teacher can offer you any inspiration.

She refuses to come near you with any form of knife, be it a bread knife or whatever.

Corrolary: She has stopped hitting you when you make provocative sexist jokes. (Unfortunately she will probably turn to more subtle ways of getting even)

You wife initially refuses to hold hands with you whenever you go for a walk together.

You actively provoke your bother-in-laws 40 kg (almost 90 lb) dog so you can try out kote gaeshi.

Any moment standing idle is a moment taken to practice tai tsabaki.

You steal the linseed oil out of the kitchen to oil your weapons. (Can't cook with that awful stuff anyway)


The mail man is more scared of you than he is of the dog: He lays the packages rather than daring to hand them to you.

Similarly, when you ask your colleagues to lend you their pen, they roll it carefully across the table rather than handing it to you...


You are in a car accident and calmly see it as an opportunity to practice blending forces. (Really happened)

MaryKaye
10-26-2005, 01:06 PM
You're frantically picking out clothes for an important scientific talk, and realize when you arrive that you're wearing a loose black skirt and long-sleeved white blouse.... (I guess as a PhD I'm entitled to the hakama?)

You arrive at the aforementioned scientific meeting with detailed notes on how to find every dojo in town, but not how to find the meeting hall....

Incidentally, the sensei at the dojo where I visited during this trip said, "If you can keep your cool while my big student here tries to slug you, giving a scientific talk should be a cakewalk" and he was quite correct.

Mary Kaye