View Full Version : Family Jewels or Skill of Ueshiba

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Michael Neal
12-14-2004, 01:44 PM
If you had a choice between keeping your family jewels or having the skill level of Ueshiba in Aikido, what would you do?

David Humm
12-14-2004, 02:02 PM
Go out and get pissed-up ? :D

12-14-2004, 02:10 PM
you mean I had a choice??!

Michael Hackett
12-14-2004, 02:51 PM
I'll check with my wife and advise.

12-14-2004, 02:59 PM
If my grandma had the family jewels, she'd of been my grandpa!

12-14-2004, 03:10 PM
If you had a choice between being you or being some other guy, which would you choose...

Michael Neal
12-14-2004, 03:21 PM
While my question is not very serious I do believe they are people out there that would make this exchange, I am not one of them.

12-14-2004, 03:29 PM
Íf you had said the skill of Shioda Sensei it might have been a question worth asking, but otherwise my bits stay where they are!

12-14-2004, 03:51 PM
Considering my family really doesn't have any jewels, I'd have to go with O'Sensei's awesomeness.


Michael Neal
12-14-2004, 03:55 PM
yes it does seem my question was maybe a little sexist

12-14-2004, 04:12 PM
I'll check with my wife and advise.

Ditto. Then again, with two kids, it's not like I'd be missing much...

Michael Neal
12-14-2004, 04:13 PM
ok then, what about just 1 family jewel

12-14-2004, 04:17 PM
Asking a question targeted specifically towards men is not sexist (although I am sure someone can think of a way that anything that has ever been said is in some way offensive). The core of the question is:
Would you trade something deeply personal and dear for what you perceive as great power?
This question has been asked in many forms throughout history and everyone should think carefully about their answer. Ultimately the value we place on power, the types of power after which we lust, and what we end up trading for that power is what defines us as humans and warriors. Before being ruined by George Lucas' fascist "midichlorian" antics, Joseph Campbell's original vision of the Force is an undercurrent of nature's power available to all living things. In this thought experiment, Darth Vader sacrificed not only his wedding tackle, but most of his human form (and much of his humanity itself) to gain access to this power. The type of sacrifice determined the type of power gained. No "quick and dirty" offering will yeild the power of good.

12-14-2004, 04:20 PM
what a full-on retarded proposition. inane. and if i had a choice i would uh...lets see yeah id cut out my ball-sac to have the skills of Osensei. is that what your asking ka-dunceky? LOL

Michael Neal
12-14-2004, 04:24 PM
Of course it is inane, I am delerious trying to get to the end of the workday by posting stupid topics that bring out my childish sense of humor.

12-14-2004, 04:25 PM
Michael, are you serious???

No matter what I wish, I will only get as skilled as I can become.
Instead of fantasizing, I would rather work on getting as good as I can become - nothing more and nothing less.

12-14-2004, 04:32 PM
The post would only be inane if there was no-one out there prepared to make such a sacrifice. As history has shown, fare more grim sacrifices have often been made to appease the thirsty gods of man. The search for power is a full-time obsession in modern society. Turn on "The Apprentice" to see the the lengths of ridicule and self-denigration to which humans will readily go.

12-14-2004, 04:33 PM
Ah, i did not realize you were wasting valuable company time!! LOL now back to work knave!

Michael Neal
12-14-2004, 04:34 PM
You are right, there is no question in my mind that there are some people who would do this. But my post was still stupid though.

12-14-2004, 04:40 PM
Why would I want to lose my balls to become less skilled?

Johan Nielsen
12-14-2004, 04:41 PM
Another good question is where you have the most skills - in the sac or on the mat?

John Boswell
12-14-2004, 04:52 PM
Well, I'm not one to brag, but according to my wife...

OH! WAIT! Umm... which sack are we talking about?? Bed "sack" or ...

ah... forget it.

*tip toes outta the room*

12-14-2004, 05:07 PM
Since the ultimate Ueshiba power was actually housed in the left testicle, such a transference cannot come to be!

12-14-2004, 05:21 PM
I was told by a student of one of O´Semsei´s Uchideshi, that O´Sensei said a true martial artist could ejaculate through a shoji!

He grinned and walked away as his students dropped their pants and......


Michael Hackett
12-14-2004, 07:05 PM
Sam Kinnison is spinning in his grave, wishing he had a microphone and computer terminal to respond with right now.........

Rocky Izumi
12-14-2004, 10:24 PM
This thread should be in the humor section. Hee hee hee.


12-15-2004, 01:43 AM
My luck I'd give up the goods and be given the skill of Monty Ueshiba, the one-eyed, club-footed carcass removal technician at the medical research facility :(


12-15-2004, 04:11 AM
Aah, my bad, I didn't think this was a serious query - OK, serious answer is if you allow yourself to be mutilated in this manner you've already lost both your jewels and the chance to attain his skills as they were not only founded in technique but were tempered by the process of attaining them in the first place. You may have gained the techniques, but the experience to use them would be missing and the weakness you've already shown in how you gained them would denote an inability to learn. I've always found that there are no true short-cuts in life.

[can I make a bad joke about hakamas or bowing now please, serious posting is exhausting]

12-15-2004, 05:56 AM
Sweet lord, does this mean that Sharon Ozbourne is now a supreme martial artist? Oh a mataphor, right, what about those lads off X-Factor, they seem to have no balls :)