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09-08-2004, 04:12 PM
I know that many of you are Senseis, so I would Like your opinion, even of you who aren't a Sensei....

My boyfriend and I both train Aikido at the same dojo, and our dojo has 2 "branches" Both Lenwakan dojos. My Senseis' son is Sensei at the other branch, any way, our exam is coming up on the 19th, so he's (my boyfriend) is training at both dojos, beacause one of them (the dojos) only opens on tuesdays, wednesdays, and thursdays. And our dojo opens every day of the week excepting Sundays... Anyway... So, my Sensei thinks that we only go there to "be kissy kissy" or whatever... BUt we're both really serious about Aikido... What would you do???? Thanks in advance!! ;)


09-08-2004, 05:44 PM
You could try general stuff to make it clear that you're a serious student:

--Be attentive during demonstrations and practice hard during practice sessions.
--Don't talk on the mat except as necessary (how much is necessary depends on your dojo style).
--Train with a variety of different people; don't pick your boyfriend first or more often than others.
--Don't shy away from training with those much more or less experienced than yourself; treat every partner as a learning opportunity.
--Ask thoughtful questions when appropriate.
--Volunteer to do chores around the dojo.
--Attend class even when your boyfriend is sick or on vacation.

If you behave in all ways like a serious student, it's very likely that sensei will eventually recognize you as such. If he doesn't, there's a problem with the dojo and you might do better elsewhere.

Mary Kaye

david evans
09-08-2004, 05:48 PM

I suppose the 'seriousness' of your training would make itself evident.

If you are committed, your sensei will see this.


Jordan Steele
09-08-2004, 07:01 PM
Are you kissy-kissy? You can't be serious about practice and interested in your boyfriend at the same time you know. For the time you practice, you two should behave as if you were friendly enemies...if that makes sense.

Iwan F. Kurniawan
09-08-2004, 08:09 PM
Hi, Tatiana!

may i suggest you not to worry about your sensei's thought. just worry about the aikido examination!!! do best both of you, i.e. be a super nage & super uke to each other in every practice you both have! ... your sensei's thought would be blown away because of your practice commitment.

many couples practice together in my dojo as well. also i and my ex-girl friend :-) ... we are now husband and wife. we had no such of this problem before (or because we didn't know that our sensei though so) as we committed practice real serious.

happy practice & happy exam, Tatiana! greeting for your boyfriend!


Lyle Laizure
09-09-2004, 01:16 PM
We have had several couples in practice. A couple have moved on to marry. For those where the relationship has dissolved one of the couple disappears and never trains again. Obviously both are on opposite ends of the extreme. Just practice hard and have fun no matter what anyone thinks. Too much worry is no fun.

Brian Vickery
09-09-2004, 03:02 PM
Hello Tatiana,

How you conduct yourself on your test will tell your instructor how serious you are about your aikido training. That will be what he remembers!

But that's just my opinion as an aikido instructor!

09-09-2004, 08:52 PM
Thanks guys! It's just that my Sensei is harder on me than on the other students just because :( .... So I really needed to know what to do...

To those of you who asked... When we're on the dojo, we pretend that we're not boyfriend and girlfriend. We pretend that we only know each other from the dojo, as good friends.... In fact I've had people ask me if we've really got a relationship, or if we're just friends :confused: ... But in genral, we're really good on the mat, the only other complaint that my Sensei has, is that I laugh too much.. Like if I do a technique wrong, I star giggling.
No body really notices, 'cause they're all talking, like telling each other that it's like that, not like this, or asking how to do the entrance, etc... BUtSensei notices, and he can really get angry about it... But I've eased off a bit, so I even more serious now on the tatame than I was... But thanks once again to you guys! It's the second time already that you've helped me out!!! Thaks!!! ;) ;*

09-13-2004, 11:40 AM
If you are getting near testing, a good instructor will probably be harder on you, and be more particular about your techniques, if he or she thinks you are worth testing and have a chance to succeed. So that's a good sign!

Here's some practical advice: Attend as many classes as possible at the dojo where the testing instructor teaches. Testing is over fairly quickly, in Aikido -- you prepare for weeks (years) before hand, and the test itself can take less time than a meal at a fast-food restaurant... So if you want the testing instructor to have the most experience with what your level of skill really is, you need to spend time in his or her classes. That way, if you flub a technique on test day (mis-understanding a call for "Ikkyo" as "Nikyo", for example), they will know whether or not it is a technique you are familiar with and also how well you perform it in class. Plus, you will know exactly what he or she is expecting to see, because they demonstrate it every time they teach.

09-20-2004, 10:46 AM
Thanks to all!! I passed my exam with 6.83 - the highest score at my dojo (between the white belts), but at other academies they got higher scores.... the highest was 7.3.

I've only been training for a month and a half/ two months, so I think I went well..... THo I could have done better. I lost my balance a little in irimi nague, but blended it into the technique, so it didn't look too bad (my mom filmed it...). And I did shiho nague ura when I was asked for omote - but aparently no points were taken off for it.... :)

Well, I passed (the exam was yesterday), and today will be the belt recieving ceremony.... I can't wait!!! At the end of the exams, my Sensei was beaming at me and saying like "See??? I was hard on you, but it payed off... Didn't it??? "... But this time, I'm going to have to spend 6 months training... No cutting it short..... LOL! ;)