The Rude master

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[Ta Kung]

Hi!

There are to few postings here in the humor section of Aikiweb... So here's my contribution. My first homemade kung-fu movie! I made it 'cause I wanted to try out my new camera.

There is some harsh language, violence and so forth. And also some groovy special effects (look at that bicycle kick!)

Hope someone likes it. We probably had more fun making it, that you'll have watching it, though. :D

Regards,

Patrik

PS. You'll need Windows Media Player 6.4 or later. The file is 2.5 Mb and approx. three and a half minutes long.

The Rude Master.wmv (http://w1.500.telia.com/~u50015917/the_rude_master.wmv)

[DaveO]

Hee hee - now THAT was funny...you fruit! (;) )

:D

[Brian H]

I am not worthy

[Ta Kung]

Thank you kind people! Dave, I'm not even sure you can call someone a fruit. It seemed like a good enough insult, though.

[DaveO]

Lol - worked well in yer video. ;)

Dave

[erikmenzel]

This was to funny.

I was drinking while watching this and nearly wet my keyboard through my nose :D :D :D

Thank you for a good laugh.

Any chances for a sequel?

Please

Pretty please

Pretty please with sugar coating

[shihonage]

That character who talks like a character from the Simpsons, is hilarious.

Also The Matrix impersonation had me laughing as well.

However I think that vile profanity has no place in a flick like this; and neither does that incredibly annoying C3PO-on-weed voice.

[Ta Kung]

Since this movie is a huge hit (;)) I'm thinking of releasing a DVD with extra features...

The profanity is a bit much, I agree. But we had a good reason. We only used bad language that we've found in kung-fu movies. Also, some of the voiceacting is ripped from my favorite kung-fu movie (the "you bastard..." part). All other voices were done by ourselves. Only my voice was given to Marcus, his voice was given to Andreas and so on. So we were, like the classic kung-fu movies, not using lipsync of any kind. :D

The hadooken part, is of course, from Street Fighter. But we used a ball instead of fire, since fire is dangerous. (We DO master the real hadooken, you know)

Which voice sounded like C3PO on weed?

And yes, there wíll be a movie called The Rude Master 2 - even ruder... :D

Regards,

Patrik

director and costaring

[Thom Hansen]

Now that was a martial arts movie worth watching

top points

i loved it

good on ya

Thom

[Jim ashby]

Better than most MA movies I've seen. Good stuff!

Have fun.

[Genex]

Okay thats bad but funny all the same. its a keeper tho. i'll have to show you guys the film i was in recently, its not a martial arts film but its funny all the same i'll have to find somewhere to upload it.

love the hyuuken by the way.

pete

[andrew]

Also, some of the voiceacting is ripped from my favorite kung-fu movie (the "you bastard..." part).
Which movie is that, then? One of my personal favorites is "36 crazy fists" which features that very line repeatedly.....

andrew

[andrew]

Having watched it, I'm pretty sure it was in fact "36 crazy fists." ("Master, help me, I must fight Ded Lee Foe!" "You Bastard! You will surely die...") Sounds like it anyhow.

Did you also buy it under the impression it was a Jackie Chan movie, only to discover his role in the film was entirely off camera?

andrew

[Ta Kung]

Having watched it, I'm pretty sure it was in fact "36 crazy fists."
Nope. It's not 36 crazy fists. I haven't seen that one, although it probably rocks! :D

The movie I stole the voices from, is called "Kinesligan"... Or actually, it's not. I don't really know the real name for it. On the cover of the movie, it sais "Kineserbanden" (but that's what it's called in Germany, I guess). There is also a picture of Bruce Lee (more like a drawing actually) and it sais "Karate hit" and "Bruce Lee action". But Bruce Lee is not even in the movie. There is also a second movie on the tape, called "The Gambler and his Kung-fu Master".

I've looked everywhere for this move, but nobody know which one it is.

The story is about Ta Kung, who is a wuss. One day, a man called Wu Tek comes to the village. He starts to take over the village, since his kung-fu is better. Ta Kung is sent to another víllage where he starts practising kung-fu... He returns and kicks Wu Teks arse. :D

Anyone seen this movie? What is it called?

Regards,

Patrik

[DaveO]

I was just curious: What software did you use to put the movie into the computer? I'm pretty computer illiterate, but I'd like to try this myself sometime.

Dave

[Ta Kung]

A few more things. The insult "bastard" is the only insult used in the entire movie (over and over again)! But that particular line used in The Rude Master, is from the scene where Ta Kung returns to the village (quotes from my head, but it's probably accurate, since I've watched that move 23 times...):

Wu Tek: "Ha ha ha ha ha! You bastard how dare you show your face here?"

Ta Kung: "Wu Tek, you've been bullying people far to long. Today... I'm gonna put a stop to it!" (smashing his hands togeather, making a kung-fu sound)

Wu Tek: "You bastard! You are gonna get killed! Aren't you scared I'll tare you apart?!"

I really love this movie. Me and my friends usually see it when we're having a party. Beer and that movie is always a great combination...

Regards,

Patrik

[Ta Kung]

Dave, I used a program called Adobe Premiere. Then I compressed the .avi file to .wmv using Microsofts Media converter. The original file was 500 Mb, high quality video and audio. But the .wmv file is only 2.5 mb! Granted, the quality is bad...

Premiere isn't that hard to use. I use it at work (that's where I also put this movie togheter! And yes, it was during workhours, hehehe!)

Love to see your work in the future, Dave. The world needs more home made kung-fu movies!!! :D

Regards,

Patrik

[erikmenzel]

Granted, the quality is bad...
Which probably adds to the weird kung-fu effect anyway.

[Chocolateuke]

Danm.. Kick Arse! Hey I really really liked the Subtitles! ( since Im hard of hearing and cant hear that much..) thx for that! I loved the, " your sitting duck style is good hell, better than mine" Wac.. the end!

[Neil Mick]

Very funny! :D :D :D :D :D

(...picking myself off floor, laughing)

[ian]

Superb! Maybe someone will do a sequel?

[tlurie]

:D

Very funny!

I loved the Liu Kang bicycle kick.

[Ta Kung]

I've talked with the other "actors" and they've agreed to do a second movie... We have allready begun exchanging ideas, some of 'em are not that bad!

Let's just hope that they stick with it. :)

Regards,

Patrik

[Veers]

ROFL! Hadoken! That was great!

(leave out the f words next time, eh?)

[j0nharris]

http://www.thekwoon.com

These guys bill themselves as bad acting, good kung fu...

And that's exactly what it is :D

Some pretty good chuckles, though...

-jon

[Creature_of_the_id]

classic!! :D

laughed all the way through, even got my girl friend out of bed to watch :D

[Ta Kung]

Guess what? This saturday (ie tomorrow) we're starting with our new project: "The Rude Master 2 - even ruder!". Stay tuned!

/Patrik

[peteswann]

Excellent!! Can't wait!!

Well, I can and will, but you know what

I mean!! :D

[andrew]

A few more things. The insult "bastard" is the only insult used in the entire movie (over and over again)!
I think I've seen films dubbed by the same people. The same thing happens in 36 crazy fists with the insults. There's also a villain called "Ded Lee Foe," as in "Ha! If you fight Ded Lee Foe you will surely die, you b*st*rd!" Has a picture of Jackie Chan on the front but explains at the start of the film that he was the fight choreographer, not one of the actors.

andrew