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Suru
07-12-2008, 10:53 AM
I have written a manuscript of poetry. It is in the hands of my agent, and we are hoping to get it published. Please respect my copyright and enjoy!

Mutual Meditation

With wings wide and drying,
An anhinga forgets all worry,
Allowing his lunch
Of scaled, speared guppies
To digest on its own.
He rests placidly,
Unafraid of his foundation beneath—
An alligator’s torso!
I watch with wonder at their stillness;
Will they snap into motion?
I listen as they chant perpetually, imperceptibly—
Ommm—Suuu—Ommm.
I assume the lotus position
Like an Easterner,
Most remote from American experience.
Extending my arms like flightless wings
I form circles with thumbs and middle digits;
Then I clear cluttered cognition to embrace peaceful nothingness.
Anhinga—alligator—man
Have become one with the deep spirit of harmony
Coursing through all things.

The Park

An aging man of eighty
Watches young men
Hone their skills on damp orange clay so they may conquer today.
Their coach forces them
To be tough as the steel fence posts.
Thrills of long-hurled throws
And fierce swings
All culminate at the end
In victory for half,
But the sagacious old man knows
Everyone has lost—
Experience has taught him defeating others corrodes the soul;
He vagrantly walks near the canal in search of ducklings to feed,
But only spots Egyptian geese
Who have chased away every visible creature
No matter how innocuous,
Because it donned a different uniform.

Hidden Blade

Every man carries a sword in his soul—
Razor sharp in its scabbard—
Ready for release
To slice through anything obstructing his
Perception of happiness;
Some wield it for protection and others aggression—
Either one stemming
From fear and insecurity—
Both of which hinder the happiness they wish to attain
Or are deluded that they maintain.
Some encumbered by self-absorption—
Animals without empathy—
Could pierce the heart of another,
Forsaking all remorse.
Wise men remind those humble enough to heed:
Through compassionate living,
Their blades they will never need to unsheathe.

Drew

mathewjgano
07-14-2008, 07:16 PM
Thanks Drew! Beautiful poetry!
It inspired the following; hope you don't mind my posting it to your thread:

Of flash of steel
no glimmer of blade
the forge of life
and the choices we've made.
The wind divine
of breath and bellows
let come what come may of thine
and see what grows.

Cheers!

Suru
07-14-2008, 07:37 PM
Matthew, after just a few reads, I enjoy your poem; it gives me a comforting sensation. I'll write more after further analysis. I actually hope this becomes an Aikido-esque poetry thread and that you and others continue to post!

Drew

Suru
08-17-2008, 01:03 PM
Your unusual rhyme scheme of -

a
b
c
b

d
e
d
e

is great because of the break up in the first stanza. The repetition, consonance, and assonance adds to the mix and makes for a really enjoyable read. "and see what grows" really hits me because even if we know we're on a proper path, we can't see our entire future until it "grows."

Drew

SeiserL
08-17-2008, 03:55 PM
We write.
We train.
We share the journey.

Nicely done.
Compliments and appreciation.

mathewjgano
08-18-2008, 04:01 PM
Your unusual rhyme scheme of -

a
b
c
b

d
e
d
e

is great because of the break up in the first stanza. The repetition, consonance, and assonance adds to the mix and makes for a really enjoyable read. "and see what grows" really hits me because even if we know we're on a proper path, we can't see our entire future until it "grows."

Drew

Thanks Drew! I appreciate the anlysis. I wish I had more of a formal understanding of poetry. I tend to fly by the seat of my pants as it were and I think it would be fascinating to dissect and compare a lot of my old poetry to find how the various patterns might correspond. I know in music, for example, certain tones and rythms are often associated with certain emotions and the like.
Lately I've been trying to think more along these terms when i construct a poem, mostly focusing on rhyme/non-rhyme schemes and beat count. I'm a big fan of William Blake and Robert Frost so I tend to have plenty of rhyming.
In this short poem I was thinking a little about Aikido in everyday life (a common theme for me these days since I don't get to train much). I imagine the highest utility of Aikido falling under these constraints; that day in and day out we may work and go about our lives in an "ordinary" way, yet under it all there is great potential for surprising degrees of sharpness. I think your poem "Hidden Blade" inspired my own short poem most directly.

mathewjgano
08-18-2008, 04:09 PM
Ahhh! To roll!
To open the gates and release the bull
To fly and twist and turn
To wake up.
I sigh between deep breaths of exhausted delight
A smile inside
And outward it shines.
The smell of hinoki and the sound of bells
of drums and laughter
forever in my heart.
To roll in Kannagara
the infinite restless flow
and a pure calm I come to know.

Suru
09-03-2008, 09:23 PM
I appreciate your appreciation, Lynn. Matthew, I really enjoy the latest work you posted. I'm trying to think back to Aikido and the Harmony of Nature - is Kannagara, "Kannagara no michi?" And does it mean "the stream of God?" Or as you put it, "the infinite restless flow? Also, I've never heard the word hinoki. Is that a type of incense? At any rate, I find it highly poetic that you mention the flow in such a flowing work of poetry. I hope you'll keep writing - we have distinct styles: yours are more free-verse while mine are more prosaic. I know poets should avoid cliches, but variety is the spice of life!

Drew