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Zach Sarver
04-23-2007, 07:04 AM
Over the weekend a kid from my school died of alcohol poisoning. He was a senior with alot of talent and a nice guy who only had a few weeks before graduation, but he made a stupid choice to drink too much. I didn't know the kid, so I can't really feel a personal lose for him, but it made me sad that someone who had alot to look forward to in life lost it all because of a stupid choice. This event has made me think about why people make these choices and how easily it is to have everything you have whisked away in a moment. It also made me think if anyone will learn anything from what happened to this guy. This weekend someone else from my school will probably go out drinking, even when they have seen first hand the effects of it. I am not saying the everyone drinks too much, most people know when to stop, but alot of high schooler who drink drink for the sole purpose of getting drunk and feel that the drunker they get the cooler it is. Again I am not saying that every high schoolers will drink this much, some know when to stop. It makes me wonder if people from my school will even think about this kid before they make that choice to drink and if his friends will ever drink again. This event will bring to light how much the choices we make effect us and the people we know, and how easy it is for life to be taken away. I am not sure if this really belongs in discussion and that this does fuel some sort of discussion. I am sorry if this post is abit incoherent. I am at school right now and this was really brought on by a need to vent.

SeiserL
04-23-2007, 07:19 AM
Welcome to my world (abuse, violence, trauma, and addiction).

My deepest condolences and compassion to family and friends.

It is most curious that even though we know the right thing to do, we tend to choose to attach to that other chatter in our head. Discipline both the body and the mind, the heart and spirit are already okay.

Janet Rosen
04-23-2007, 10:27 AM
Zachary, I'm so sorry to read your posting.
What a waste - with all the genuine trials that life poses, so many ways in which we can become ill or broken by outside forces, it seems absurd for a person to actively court such danger when there is no possible gain - except perhaps the temporary numbing of pain. Now rendered permanent for him but alas in the effects on his friends and family, inflicting exactly the type of trials and pain to which I refer....

James Davis
04-23-2007, 11:57 AM
It also made me think if anyone will learn anything from what happened to this guy.
It seems that you have.

This event will bring to light how much the choices we make effect us and the people we know, and how easy it is for life to be taken away. I am not sure if this really belongs in discussion and that this does fuel some sort of discussion. I am sorry if this post is abit incoherent. I am at school right now and this was really brought on by a need to vent.


Vent away, Zac. Even if we have nothing to offer, we can stll read it, and feel for you. I strongly suggest that you talk to someone, face to face, about this.

Zach Sarver
04-23-2007, 09:48 PM
Some of my friends were friends with the kids that died, so I have been talking with them trying to help them out, I am sure they are feeling this alot more deeply than I am, theirs is a personal loss, while mine is a loss that I don't really know what to call, confusion I guess. I guess I have been getting more angry than sad. Angry at society in general.

SeiserL
04-24-2007, 08:06 AM
Denial: Same old map, nothing changed (despite the fact that something did).

Anger: The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.

Bargaining; "If only" this and "if only" that, until you realize "if only" didn't happen.

Sadness: Beneath the anger, is the pain.

Acceptance: The map has changed to match the new territory. I don't have to understand, like, or agree with it. I just have to accept that something changed.

Grieving is a process.

dps
04-24-2007, 08:25 AM
We learn from the mistakes we make and from the mistakes that others make. Unfortunately some of the others, especially loved ones and friends, don't survive their mistakes to learn.

Sorry for you loss.

David

Kim S.
04-25-2007, 09:14 PM
A couple weeks ago, my drama class performed a short play on drunk driving. Some of the students in the audience laughed at it. MY drama teacher explain to me that when teenagers don't understand something or afraid of something they hide behind their laughter. So maybe it is going to take a while for the diseased's friends to realized their friend is dead.

Janet Rosen
04-25-2007, 09:42 PM
MY drama teacher explain to me that when teenagers don't understand something or afraid of something they hide behind their laughter.
Kimberly, grown ups do that too. Sad to say.

Princess Rose
04-25-2007, 11:16 PM
I’m very sorry that this happened in your school. What is even sadder is that this happens in almost every school in the US. As a freshman in college I see this almost every weekend. My dorm has gotten the bad rep as being the wild one. There is an ambulance outside of here at least once or twice a month. There are always girls throwing up in the bathroom. A big problem is the “oh she’s fine” attitude or the “don’t let the RA see her we’ll get in trouble.” I’ve been wondering about this problem for a while, and it recently came up again. The other night my roommate asked if she could borrow my car with the line “I’m really good at driving drunk, I’ve had a lot of practice.” Of course the answer was no lol. But it got me thinking. My parents have always had a very open approach to drugs and alcohol. Mainly they wouldn’t care if I did drugs or drank but they always tried to educate me about overuse and putting yourself or others in harm. This open environment made me feel comfortable to call them if I was ever drunk or in trouble because I knew I wouldn’t get in trouble with them. The funny thing is that I don’t do drugs, and while I have played a few games of beer pong, I’ve never been drunk before. It just never appealed to me at all. I’d much rather get high on breakfalls. My roommate, however, came from a family who instilled the value of stripping my roommate of all rights/freedom/fun/life if caught doing drugs. The sad thing is that it doesn’t stop her from drinking and getting high, it just stops her from getting caught. That is where people tend to lack concern for their lives to protect their social lives. If the school educated kids about safe use instead of punishment, would the death rate go down? If parents supported their kids more instead of grounding them would they be as inclined to sneak around with their drug use? Would it be a bad thing if drug use went up if deaths went down? Is that even possible?
IDK
Controversial topic.

Zach Sarver
04-26-2007, 06:11 PM
Yeah, in my school there is a drug education class but it is a joke. The teacher doesn't really teach and you don't even have to pay attention to pass. Its one of those classes that you just have to show up for, its not even a requirement to pass high school

jennifer paige smith
05-06-2007, 11:20 AM
Yeah, in my school there is a drug education class but it is a joke. The teacher doesn't really teach and you don't even have to pay attention to pass. Its one of those classes that you just have to show up for, its not even a requirement to pass high school

I'm thinking of your first posting and the emphasis you placed on choices. For my life, I'm grateful to aikido for teaching me the value of dicipline and the responsibility of freedom. Freedom is built upon responsibility and responsibility builds better choice making. Some of us get this lesson in time to save our own lives. Some of us get it only in time to save others.
Last year in my high school Aikido class there was the most popular, inspiring, light-hearted, beautful young man named Peter. He went out drinking with two of his friends on one of their birthdays , they got in a car and drove way too fast; two of them died, including Peter. The other boy was charged with vehicular manslaughter after he came out of a coma. We all cried the next day. All of us. The entire school body was in pain at the loss of one of our parts. We put up a picture of him, we told stories of our times with him, and we carried on in our grief until we were through with the wave of emotion that threatened to drown us . As you can imagine, the loss for everyone was tremendous.
Please give yourself time to feel what you feel, say what you say, and to dream of a future once again.

My heart goes out to you in your time of grief and of gathering wisdom. ( I wish there was a heart icon to add here:) )

jen