Hello and thank you for visiting AikiWeb, the
world's most active online Aikido community! This site is home to
over 22,000 aikido practitioners from around the world and covers a
wide range of aikido topics including techniques, philosophy, history,
humor, beginner issues, the marketplace, and more.
If you wish to join in the discussions or use the other advanced
features available, you will need to register first. Registration is
absolutely free and takes only a few minutes to complete so sign up today!
Coming from another teacher I'd take this as a criticism. Some teachers would mean this as "you are unteachable". But, from this teacher I know it means that anything I learn from here on out is up to me. My personal study is more important than what I am taught.
Sounds great, doesn't it? Wow, I've Arrived!! I'm so cool I don't even need a teacher to learn!!
So, how come this feels like a huge letdown?
Maybe it's because this doesn't really mean I have nothing to learn from anyone, it's just that going to class and going through the motions isn't going to be enough anymore. Or that it means that the really hard work has now begun. Or that I don't 100% agree with his assesment.
There are so many holes in my training. There is no doubt that I've accomplished a lot in the last five years that I've been steadily training. It even appears that I accomplished more in the intervening years when I'd stopped training than I would have expected. Apparently, I can learn on my own pretty well.
But I learn what I know how to learn.
There has to be some kind of foundation, something for me to practice and refine.
Most of the "holes" in my training are holes because there is no foundation. So I have to find ways to build that foundation. One of these holes, weapons training, turns out to be relatively easy to work on. Others are harder.
Meanwhile, I need to find ways to keep my regular training going and improve on the stuff I do know. All this while keeping up my teaching.
I guess the real truth is that I don't need a teacher, I need several of them. But even then, it's all up to me to integrate what I'm learning and become my own aikidoka.
It's an exciting place to be in my training. It also scares the tar out of me. If I succeed I get to take all the credit. If I fail I have no one to blame but myself.