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Brief though it's been, it feels very good to get on the mat again. It was such an unusual feeling to put the gi back on because on one hand it was so familiar, but on the other it was very new feeling. I just kept thinking what a new, old feeling it was and how there's no replacement for the visceral experience of practice.
One of the key things that stood out to me was the difference between being a 19 year old and a 32 year old. I certainly don't remember there being quite so many pops and clicks to my movement. I've been beat up by my job in construction, so my wrists aren't flexible like they once were. I've unlearned a lot of whatever I may have learned about not using my shoulders too, particularly when it came to practicing suburi, and I had to keep reminding myself to relax, stand up straight, and feel the ground with my feet.
One point of interest to me was how the katatetori portion of waza has changed a bit. Not that I had the older version we practiced down very well, but it was still strongly in my muscle memory so I had to constantly remind myself how I was going to suppress nage instead of just sort of doing it. I also really enjoyed the new swordwork drills.
All in all it felt so great to be there, to see people I haven't seen in a decade still training hard and refining their practice; not flaking out like I did. Being around people like that is great for people like me who do tend to go off into flights of fancy. It sets an example...a firm reminder of what dedication to practice really means...or can mean, at least.
My only frustration came from realizing how far I've drifted in my accuity. At one point I threw my training partner right into the path of someone else, and at another I actually threw him right into another person. I still feel like an idiot because I've always prided myself on being a safe partner and having good spacial awareness, but I clearly wasn't up to par.
Which I suppose brings me back to the idea that in all things, good bad or indifferent, we must move forward and not dwell on the past...or if we must, as I undoubtedly will to some extent, use it to fuel progress.
Anyhow, my training isn't much to write about (not that that has ever stopped me before), but it's better than it was a month ago and I'm happy to see renewed motivation building in me. I will have to keep on keeping on, and maybe I'll be able to write some day about how much progress I've made instead of how much I've allowed it to dwindle.
Lazy Bastard signing off.