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I greet the world with open hands on this day, ready to receive. A point that we touched on during the seminar was not using the fingers tips to throw. Not grasping or grabbing just letting and guiding.
Ron suggested to me the other day when I was griping about my ukes that I needed to go more inside. I have been thoughtful about that for many days. At the seminar we did a ki test where I could feel my partner directing me without moving because she was moving my center by moving her center. Thanks, Dora, now I understand a little better what Ron was talking about. I see I have a lot to work on. Yay! It has nothing to do with my ukes. I knew that in my heart yet without the chat with Ron I wouldn't have known what to do next.
Growth spurts can be hard. I throw too hard; get impatient with people, think I need to drive to Texas….and any other distractions could fit in that blank. Really, what I need is an honest chat with a good friend or in this case, husband and then implement his suggestions into my practice. This is all part of what makes Aikido so interesting. Of course, hindsight is much nicer than the unrest I was feeling a couple of weeks ago. Yet here is some compassion I hold for myself. I kept training and taking care of my uke. No matter what. The inner stuff is uncomfortable but my process has come to point where it is not noticeable to others. This is progress. I am accepting the process rather than trying to grab it before I am ready. I am learning to let.